written and illustrated by qrowscant
<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/titlecard.gif">
(align:"=><=")+(box:"=XXXXXXXX=")[
=|||=
| [[START->Interview 1.1]] |
=||||||||=
| [CONTENT WARNINGS]<c1| |
[]<c2| (click-rerun:?c1)[(replace:?c2)[- flashing
- eyestrain
- descriptions of body horror
- descriptions of physical/emotional abuse
- implied assault
- implied alcohol abuse
]]] (click-rerun:?c1)[(replace:?c2)[]]{
<div class="div1"> (click:?me)[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[NEXT OF KIN]] </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
(link-reveal:"They found him this morning, half naked and hidden in the underbrush.")[ The autopsy declared the death an accident, the examiner determined the corpse was infected, and [the handler]<c1| brought |me>[me] in to speak with it after (link-reveal:"half a day of questioning.")[
<p>
(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[ [ [“We'll take this one step at a time,” she assures me.]<step| ]](click:?step)[<p> She’s a stocky woman in her early forties. Kind face, thin hair. Worry lines etched in her skin from years of dealing with |people>[people like me]. They deepen as we make eye contact. (click:?people)[<p>(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[“And if you want to stop at any time, tell me. You're under no obligation to [stay]<speak|.”]
(click:?speak)[<p>
She’s right. I don’t //have// to do this. I can go home right now, call the station and tell them to cremate the body. |gone>[It's not my fault he's gone.]
(click:?gone)[<p>
And I don't //need// closure. I need him scrubbed from my memory with [bleach and steel wool]<bleach|.(click:?bleach)[(live: 2s)[(stop:)[
<p>
(align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========")[“Could you explain things again? For my own sake.”] (live: 6s)[(stop:)[
<p>
(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[ [[“Of course, ma’am.”->medical1.1]] ]
]]]]]]]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
(click:?c1)[<img src ="https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/nurse.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[HIS HANDLER]] </div>}{
<div class="div1"> <img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"> <p>(css: "background-color:black;")[NEXT OF KIN]</div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[ |dry>[“Does that make sense, ma’am?”]] (click:?dry)[
<p>
(align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========")[My mouth is dry. (live: 1.5s)[(stop:) ["I think so."]<think| ]] (click:?think)[
<p>
She leads me to a freezing room sectioned into [two halves]<two| by glass and a paper curtain. (click:?two)[(text-color:"#343434")[ (It’s like we’re kids again, stuck in a shoebox of a bedroom together and obsessively (text-color:"#414141")[|divide>[dividing it in two]].// It’s not fair//, you'd complain. //I'm older! I deserve more!//)]]
<p>
(click:?divide)[On my half there’s a folding table and two chairs, fake potted plants, and an analog clock that’s an hour off. I can barely make out the [other side]<your| of the room(click:?your)[, but I notice the [silhouette of a man]<man| through the curtain.(click:?man)[
<p>
(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[“It’s for your own sake,” she says, after I ask about it. “The freezing temperature slows the decomposition, but he’s still far from presentable. [[I don’t want your last image of him to be…”->interview 1.3]] ]
<p>
]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3"> <img src ="https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/nurse.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[HIS HANDLER]
(click:?man)[<p>
<img src= "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ezgif-1-3d3d82db49.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[HIM]]
</div>}{
<div class="div1"> <img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"><p>NEXT OF KIN </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[“Does that make sense, ma’am?”]
<p>
(align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========")[My mouth is dry. “I think so.”]
<p>
She leads me to a freezing room sectioned into [two halves]<two| by glass and a paper curtain. (text-color:"#343434")[ (It’s like we’re kids again, stuck in a cramped shoebox of a bedroom together and obsessively (text-color:"#414141")[dividing it in two.]// It’s not fair//, you'd complain. //I'm older! I deserve more!//)]
<p>
On my half there’s a folding table and two chairs, fake potted plants, and an analog clock that’s an hour off. I can barely make out the other side of the room, but I notice the silhouette of a man through the curtain.
<p>
(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[“It’s for your own sake,” she says, after I ask about it. “The freezing temperature slows the decomposition, but he’s still far from presentable. I don’t want your last image of him to be…” ]
<p>
[[A bloated, rotting corpse.->interview 1.4]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
<img src= "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ezgif-1-3d3d82db49.gif"><p>HIM </div>}{
<div class="div1"><img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"> <p>NEXT OF KIN </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[“Does that make sense, ma’am?”]
<p>
(align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========")[My mouth is dry. “I think so.”]
<p>
She leads me to a freezing room sectioned into [two halves]<two| by glass and a paper curtain. (text-color:"#343434")[ (It’s like we’re kids again, stuck in a cramped shoebox of a bedroom together and obsessively (text-color:"#414141")[dividing it in two.]// It’s not fair//, you'd complain. //I'm older! I deserve more!//)]
<p>
On my half there’s a folding table and two chairs, fake potted plants, and an analog clock that’s an hour off. I can barely make out the other side of the room, but I notice the silhouette of a man through the curtain.
<p>
(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[“It’s for your own sake,” she says, after I ask about it. “The freezing temperature slows the decomposition, but he’s still far from presentable. I don’t want your last image of him to be…”]
<p>
A bloated, rotting corpse. [[A parasite-ridden body.->interview 1.5]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
<img src= "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ezgif-1-3d3d82db49.gif"><p>HIM</div>}{
<div class="div1"> <img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"><p>NEXT OF KIN </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[“Does that make sense, ma’am?”]
<p>
(align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========")[My mouth is dry. “I think so.”]
<p>
She leads me to a freezing room sectioned into [two halves]<two| by glass and a paper curtain. (text-color:"#343434")[ (It’s like we’re kids again, stuck in a cramped shoebox of a bedroom together and obsessively (text-color:"#414141")[dividing it in two.]// It’s not fair//, you'd complain. //I'm older! I deserve more!//)]
<p>
On my half there’s a folding table and two chairs, fake potted plants, and an analog clock that’s an hour off. I can barely make out the other side of the room, but I notice the silhouette of a man through the curtain.
<p>
(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[ “It’s for your own sake,” she says, after I ask about it. “The freezing temperature slows the decomposition, but he’s still far from presentable. I don’t want your last image of him to be…”]
<p>
A bloated, rotting corpse. A parasite-ridden body. [[A centerpiece for nightmares.->interview 1.6]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
<img src= "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ezgif-1-3d3d82db49.gif"> <p>HIM</div>}{
<div class="div1"><img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"> <p>NEXT OF KIN </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[“Does that make sense, ma’am?”]
<p>
(align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========")[My mouth is dry. “I think so.”]
<p>
She leads me to a freezing room sectioned into [two halves]<two| by glass and a paper curtain. (text-color:"#343434")[ (It’s like we’re kids again, stuck in a cramped shoebox of a bedroom together and obsessively (text-color:"#414141")[dividing it in two.]// It’s not fair//, you'd complain. //I'm older! I deserve more!//)]
<p>
On my half there’s a folding table and two chairs, fake potted plants, and an analog clock that’s an hour off. I can barely make out the other side of the room, but I notice the silhouette of a man through the curtain.
<p>
(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[ “It’s for your own sake,” she says, after I ask about it. “The freezing temperature slows the decomposition, but he’s still far from presentable. I don’t want your last image of him to be…”]
<p>
A bloated, rotting corpse. A parasite-ridden body. A centerpiece for nightmares. (text-color:"#343434")[ [[//I’m sure you have enough of those already//, her eyes say.->interview 1.7]] ]
</div>
<div class="div3">
<img src= "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ezgif-1-3d3d82db49.gif"> <p>HIM</div>}{
<div class="div1"> <img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"> <p>NEXT OF KIN</div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[“Does that make sense, ma’am?”]
<p>
(align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========")[My mouth is dry. “I think so.”]
<p>
She leads me to a freezing room sectioned into [two halves]<two| by glass and a paper curtain. (text-color:"#343434")[ (It’s like we’re kids again, stuck in a cramped shoebox of a bedroom together and obsessively (text-color:"#414141")[dividing it in two.]// It’s not fair//, you'd complain. //I'm older! I deserve more!//)]
<p>
On my half there’s a folding table and two chairs, fake potted plants, and an analog clock that’s an hour off. I can barely make out the other side of the room, but I notice the silhouette of a man through the curtain.
<p>
(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[ “It’s for your own sake,” she says, after I ask about it. “The freezing temperature slows the decomposition, but he’s still far from presentable. I don’t want your last image of him to be…”]
<p>
A bloated, rotting corpse. A parasite-ridden body. A centerpiece for nightmares. (text-color:"#343434")[//I’m sure you have enough of those already//], her eyes say. (text-color:"#343434")[ [[//When was the last time you felt safe in your own skin?//->interview 1.8]] ]
</div>
<div class="div3">
<img src= "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ezgif-1-3d3d82db49.gif"><p>HIM</div>}{
<div class="div1"><img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"> <p>NEXT OF KIN </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[“Does that make sense, ma’am?”]
<p>
(align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========")[My mouth is dry. “I think so.”]
<p>
She leads me to a freezing room sectioned into [two halves]<two| by glass and a paper curtain. (text-color:"#343434")[ (It’s like we’re kids again, stuck in a cramped shoebox of a bedroom together and obsessively (text-color:"#414141")[dividing it in two.]// It’s not fair//, you'd complain. //I'm older! I deserve more!//)]
<p>
On my half there’s a folding table and two chairs, fake potted plants, and an analog clock that’s an hour off. I can barely make out the other side of the room, but I notice the silhouette of a man through the curtain.
<p>
(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[“It’s for your own sake,” she says, after I ask about it. “The freezing temperature slows the decomposition, but he’s still far from presentable. I don’t want your last image of him to be…”]
<p>
A bloated, rotting corpse. A parasite-ridden body. A centerpiece for nightmares. (text-color:"#343434")[//I’m sure you have enough of those already//], her eyes say.(text-color:"#343434")[// When was the last time you felt safe in your own skin?//]
<p>
[[I blink.->interview 1.9]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
<img src= "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ezgif-1-3d3d82db49.gif"><p>HIM</div>}{
<div class="div1"><img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"> <p>(css: "background-color:black;")[NEXT OF KIN] </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[“Does that make sense, ma’am?”]
<p>
(align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========")[My mouth is dry. “I think so.”]
<p>
She leads me to a freezing room sectioned into [two halves]<two| by glass and a paper curtain. (text-color:"#343434")[ (It’s like we’re kids again, stuck in a cramped shoebox of a bedroom together and obsessively (text-color:"#414141")[dividing it in two.]// It’s not fair//, you'd complain. //I'm older! I deserve more!//)]
<p>
On my half there’s a folding table and two chairs, fake potted plants, and an analog clock that’s an hour off. I can barely make out the other side of the room, but I notice the silhouette of a man through the curtain.
<p>
(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[“It’s for your own sake,” she says, after I ask about it. “The freezing temperature slows the decomposition, but he’s still far from presentable. I don’t want your last image of him to be his current state."]
<p>
(link-reveal:"I blink.")[(align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========")[ |sense>[“Thank you for clarifying.”]]
(click:?sense)[
<p>
The chair creaks as I sit in it. Metal jabs into my back and I shift around— once, twice, three times— unable to get comfortable.
<p> (live: 6s)[(stop:)
[[He's waiting.->brother 1.1]]
]]]
</div>
<div class="div3"><img src ="https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/nurse.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[HIS HANDLER] <p>
<img src= "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ezgif-1-3d3d82db49.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[HIM] </div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> <img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[SISTER] </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
$her[[“...”]<c1|] (click:?c1)[
<p>
$him[“Ines?”] (live: 2s)[(stop:)
<p>
He drags out my name like he’s recalling how to say it. From behind the curtain comes a harsh cough, something akin to (link-reveal:"clearing your throat.")[
<p>
$her[“Hey,” [I tap my fingers on the table.]<c2|(click:?c2)[ <p> “[I came to see you.]<c3|”]] (click:?c3)[
<p>
$him[“What… happened?”] (live: 2s)[(stop:)
<p>
$her[“You’re dead. [You were drinking]<c4|.”(click:?c4)[<p> My tone is is accusatory. [I swallow it down]<c5|.]] (click:?c5)[
<p>
$him[“Yeah,” he shifts in his chair. //Is it uncomfortable?// “But I drink most nights."<p> ["What changed?"]<c6|] (click:?c6)[
<p>
$her[“[You tell me.]<c7|”] (click:?c7)[
<p>
$him[“I think…(live: 2s)[(stop:) I choked.(live: 3s)[(stop:) [[Alone->brother 1.2]].]]"]
]]]]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
<img src= "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ezgif-1-3d3d82db49.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[BROTHER]
</div>}{
<div class="div1"> <img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ines%20young.gif"> </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
In a church next to a cemetery, surrounded by a field of green and a chain-link fence, is a room of [many pews]<pew|.(click:?pew)[ Light filters through the stained glass windows bathing [it]<within|(click:?within)[(text-color:"#343434")[— and the woman within—]] in gold. I have been here |many>[many times](click:?many)[(text-color:"#343434")[, on Sundays, in dreams, in nightmares. Never alone. Always following]]. (click:?many)[[<p>Will I ever leave?]<leave|] (click:?leave)[
<p>(live: 2s)[(stop:)[
//When you learn [forgiveness]<forgive|//, says [the woman in gold.]<she| ]]]] (click:?forgive)[
<p>
(live: 3s)[(stop:)[
(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[“Not for him, but for yourself. (link-reveal:"You must let your wounds knit back together.")[ |time>[Time will see you healed].”] ]
(click:?time)[<p>
(align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========")[[“Time did not make me forget.”]<time2|]
(click:?time2)[(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[“It did, my love. (link-reveal:"Like mesh filtering debris.")[ [I am sorry only the hurt remains.]<remain|]"
]]
(click:?remain)[(align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========")[“I don’t want an apology. [I want it to stop.]<stop|”
] ]
(click:?stop)[(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[ [["I know."->dream 1.7]] ] ]
]
]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
(click:?she)[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/mama.gif"> ] </div>}{
<div class="div1"> <img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ines%20young.gif"> </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[“[But you confessed nothing, my love.]<nothing| (click:?nothing)[You held your hate inside, and suddenly [it was too late]<toolate|. (click:?toolate)[ [I was gone.]<gone|(click:?gone)[ [ Shattered glass and broken floorboards.]<broken| (click:?broken)[ [He burned my body so it wouldn’t come back.]<back|]]]]"
(click:?back)[<p> "//She would have understood//, you tell yourself. [//Why didn’t I say anything?//]<anything|"]
]
<p>
(align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========")[(click:?anything)[[“You’ve always loved him more.”]<more|] ]
<p>
(align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")[(click:?more)["[ ...]<maybe|"]]
(click:?maybe)[
<p>
[["If that makes it easier."->interview2]]
]
</div>
<div class="div3">
{<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/mama.gif"> </div> }</div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1">(click:?me)[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ines%20young.gif"> ] </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
[He]<he| stand before [me]<me|, golden light framing him like a halo. He does not speak. He does not move. |halp>[He is waiting for me to fall in line.]
(click:?halp)[<p>
$her[ “Time makes it easier.” ] (live: 2s)[(stop:)[
$him[[“...”]<c1|] (click:?c1)[
$her[“My body healed. There are no scars, there are no aches, there is nothing but (link-reveal:"unblemished skin slowly losing its shape.")[ It knows it wasn't meant to [live this long]<c2|.” ]](click:?c2)[(live: 2s)[(stop:)[
$him[ [“...”]<c3| ](click:?c3)[
$her[“My mind, though… (link-reveal:"There are a hundred, million reminders that set it aflame.")[ (link-reveal:"There are sounds that make me jump.")[ (link-reveal:"Phrases that make me sick.")[ [Parts I can no longer touch]<touch|.”]]]] (click:?touch)[(live: 2s)[(stop:)[
$him[ [[“...”->dream 2.2]] ]
]]]]]]]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
(click:?he)[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/saint.gif"> ] </div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1">[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ines2.gif"> ] </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
$her[ [“You ruined me. You fucking ruined me.”]<c1|](click:?c1)[
$him[“...” ] (live: 2s)[(stop:)[
$her[[“What did I do to deserve it?”]<c2| ](click:?c2)[
$him[“...”](live: 2s)[(stop:)[
$her[[“Please, just tell me.”]<c3| ] (click:?c3)[
$him[“...”] (live: 2s)[(stop:)[
$her[["Please..."]<c4| ] (click:?c4)[
$him[“...”] (live: 2s)[(stop:)[
$her["(link:"I hate you.")[(link:"//I hate you!//")[[...]<here|] ]"]
(click:?here)[ (live: 2s)[(stop:)[$him[ [["She's always loved you more."->dream2.3]] ]]
]]]]]]]]]]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/saint.gif"> ] </div>}{
<div class="div1"> </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
It takes me three days for me to leave the house. (link-reveal:"I don’t shower, I don’t eat, I don’t sleep.")[ I spent my days sitting in my hotel room, (link:"waiting")[paralyzed by [fear]<fear|]. (click:?fear)[The phone rings countless times. I can’t answer it. I can’t be asked if I’m coming back. (link-reveal:"I can’t.")[
<p>
(link-reveal:"//I should've killed you.//")[
<p>
I know I'm safe. I know. But the fact that he said it(click:?crawl)[ (text-color:"#343434")[— still takes pleasure in making me feel small, even as a corpse struggling to remember anything —]] makes my [skin crawl]<crawl|. Makes the world feel [faint]<faint|. (click:?faint)[
<p>
He remembers (link:"me.")[[how scared I was]<escape|.](click:?escape)[
<p>
He can’t hurt me anymore. He’ll be (link:"gone")[dead] in a few days. (link-reveal:"Seeing him was a mistake.")[ (link-reveal:"Visiting was a mistake.")[ (link-reveal:"Why did I think he’d be different?")[ Why am I so hell-bent on [forgiveness]<cain|? (click:?cain)[
<p>
(link:"I should be happy he's gone.")[(link:"I should be thankful he's dead!")[(link:"There should be nothing left but venom.")[(link:"It's supposed to be easy.")[(link:"Its supposed bring me peace.")[(link:"What has he done besides teach me a million ways to hurt?")[(live: 3s)[(stop:)[(link:"...")[(link:"I was supposed to die before you.")[(link:"That's how it goes. That's how it's meant to be.")[(link:"I didn't. I'm sorry.")[
<p>
Again, my phone rings. <p> (live: 3s)[(stop:)[
[[I answer.->missing1.2]]
]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
(click:?c1)[handler.jpg] </div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> (click:?me)[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ines2.gif">(css: "background-color:black;")[NEXT OF KIN ]] </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
|me>[I’m] greeted by a [man with a familiar voice]<man|. (link-reveal:"I think he delivered the death notice.")[ (link-reveal:"Or maybe he questioned me.")[ Or... (live: 2s)[(stop:)[
<p>
$him[“Miss Alvarez?” He speaks slowly, firmly, but his voice [shakes]<crack|.] (click:?crack)[
<p>
He’s panicking. (link-reveal:"Why?")[
<p>
$her[ ["This is she."]<thisisshe|] (click:?thisisshe)[
<p>
$him[“We’re calling to update you on the status of your [brother]<brotherr|. ”] (click:?brotherr)[
<p>
$her[“Has the parasite passed?(link:" Maybe it’s better if it has.")[" //Maybe it's better if it has//, I want to say. [The words catch in my throat and I stifle a cough.]<throat|]](click:?throat)[
<p>
$him[“No. (live: 4s)[(stop:)[Your brother… (live: 2s)[(stop:)[ [he…]<brother|]]]]”] (click:?brother)[
<p>
[A deep breath. Like ripping off a bandaid.]<comes|(click:?comes)[
<p>
$him[“Ma’am, he’s been [missing]<missing| for almost thirty hours. The police are currently looking for him.”] (click:?missing)[
$him[“[We’re doing our best to resolve this.]<resolve| (click:?resolve)[If you have any leads on [[where he might —->missing 1.3]]]"]
<p>
]]]]]]]]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
(click:?man)[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/man%20phone.gif">(css: "background-color:black;")[A STRANGER ]] </div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========")) (set:$safe to false) (set:$familiar to false)
<div class="div1"> </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
(link-reveal:"I hang up.")[ I let my phone fall to the side, then throw it across the room when it rings again and again. I sit in bed for another half-hour before reality (link-reveal:"sinks in.")[<p>
(link-reveal:"//Missing.//")[
<p>
(link-reveal:"I laugh.")[ A giggle at first, quiet and disbelieving, but it bubbles up to a cackle, then suddenly I’m doubled over and (link-reveal:"shaking.")[ (link-reveal:"Thirty hours.")[ (link-reveal:"//Thirty hours!//")[ They lost a body locked inside of a room, inside of a building filled with (link-reveal:"people.")[ Living, perceptive people. And he’s (link-reveal:"//missing!//")[<p>
(link-reveal:"Who let this happen?")[ <p>
(link:"Where did it go?")[Where did he go?<p>
The laughter subsides. My stomach hurts. My head is pounding. (link--reveal:"My chest is tight.")[<p>
(link-reveal:"They’re not going to find him.")[ In life, he was remarkably good at escaping the police. Apparently in death he’s even better. (text-color:"#343434")[ Four days to find his body.] Missing for thirty hours in a town where everyone (link-reveal:"knows each other.")[ I guess nobody knew him besides (link-reveal:"me.")[<p>
I throw on a pair of shoes and a ratty windbreaker. I’m greasy, I’m exhausted, I’m starving. (link-reveal:"I’m out of the door and starting my car in minutes.")[ They won’t find him, but I will.
<p>
(link-reveal:"Think.")[ Where would you go if you were a shambling corpse barely hanging on to your [[previous life->missing 1.4]]?
]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
</div>}{
<div class="div1"> </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
|C>[I WOULD GO...] (click:?C)[ <p>
=|=
(if: $safe is false)[SOMEWHERE SAFE (click-rerun:"SOMEWHERE SAFE",(action:'mouseover'))[(replace:?A)[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/safe.gif"> <p>[[>>>>>->missingsafe]]]] ]
=|=
(if: $familiar is false)[SOMEWHERE FAMILIAR (click-rerun:"SOMEWHERE FAMILIAR",(action:'mouseover'))[(replace:?A)[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/familiar.gif"> <p> [[>>>>>->missingfamiliar]] ]] ]<p>
|==|
<p><p>
[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/blank.gif">]<A|
]<B|</div>
<div class="div3">
(click:?c1)[handler.jpg] </div>}
{<div class="div2">
<p><p>
When we were kids, this place was a diner. We went to church with the owners. You and their son were [best friends]<friend|.(click:?friend)[ You’d disappear for a weekend and go hunting, or fishing, or to stay the night. [Normal things.]<normal|<p> (click:?normal)[ (text-color:"#343434")[I liked when you were gone.
<p>I fell asleep on the couch waiting for (text-color:"#414141")[[you->mf1]] to return.] ]]
</div>
}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> (click:?me)[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ines2.gif">(css: "background-color:black;")[NEXT OF KIN ]] </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
When we were kids, Mom would kick us out of the house during the week so we’d get [fresh air and sunshine]<sun|.(click:?sun)[ There wasn’t a bus stop by us, so we settled for walking half a mile into [the woods]<woods| behind our house, hand in hand. (click:?woods)[ [Cobwebs hit our face, poison ivy scraped our ankles, and ticks tried their damndest to bite us]<cobweb|. ]](click:?cobweb)[ (go-to:"safe2")]
<p>
</div>
<div class="div3">
(click:?man)[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/man%20phone.gif">(css: "background-color:black;")[MISS BARTENDER]] </div>}{<div class="div4">
Morituis, commonly known as the “ghost fluke” or “deadworm” is a parasite found within the [central nervous system (CNS)]<system| of mammals. Infections within humans are common and often unnoticed, as they typically cause [no harm] to its host.
<p>
<p>
(css: "background-color:black;")[ [[>>>>>->medical1.2]]]
</div>
}{<div class="div4">
In the event that its human host dies, the ghost fluke will continue to [stimulate the CNS]. The host’s body [continues to rot]<bye|, but it retains a similar level of [speech and higher thought] as when living. This is most useful in cases of foul play, but can be used as a form of closure for the deceased's family.
<p>
<p>
(css: "background-color:black;")[ [[>>>>>->medical1.3]]]
</div>
}{<div class="div4"> Due to the decomposing brain matter, the host’s memories may not be [completely intact]<system|. Their vocal chords may also suffer from [early decomposition]<harm|. Please be patient, willing to elaborate, and avoid potentially distressing [topics of conversation]<bye|.
<p>
<p>
(css: "background-color:black;")[[[>>>>>->medical1.4]]]
</div>}{<div class="div4"> As parasites require a living host, the parasite will perish after about [7 days]<harm|. Afterwards, the body will cease functioning. If given the consent of the next of kin, the body can be cremated to [prematurely end its life cycle]<bye|.
<p>
<p>
(css: "background-color:black;")[[[>>>>>-> interview 1.2]]]
</div>}{
<div class="div1"> </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
Five days ago, you stumbled out of a shitty bar and into your dinged-up pickup truck. The roads are always clear at 3am, so nobody noticed you speeding down [the pothole-ridden streets]<care|. (click:?care)[(text-color:"#343434")[ (And anyone who saw didn't care.)] (live: 4s)[(stop:)
<p>
At some point in the 30 minute commute back home, you pulled over and [climbed out of your car.]<car| (click:?car)[ (text-color:"#343434")[(Also not uncommon. When we were kids, the sheriff would call me and mom to pull you off whatever piece of public property you’d draped yourself across.)] (live: 7s)[(stop:)
<p>
You crawled into the dewy grass and laid there like you were already dead. You stared up at the stars through the trees, and could not help yourself when you began [choking on your own vomit]<vomit|. (click:?vomit)[ (text-color:"#343434")[(In trying to purge the poison, your body killed you.)] <p> (live: 3s)[(stop:)[
(link-reveal:"It took police four days to notice your car and corpse.")[
<p>
[[Were you lonely?->brother 1.3]]
]]]]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
(click:?c1)[handler.jpg] </div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> <img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[SISTER] </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
$him[“I think… I choked. Alone."] (live: 2s)[(stop:)
<p>
$her["It’s coming back. [That’s good]<c1|." ] (click:?c1)[
<p>
$him[“There’s a lot.”] (live: 3s)[(stop:)
<p>
$her[“[Do you remember what you did to me?]<c2|”] (click:?c2)[ (live: 2s)[(stop:)
<p>
The silence is confirmation that //[no, no he doesn’t]<c3|//. (click:?c3)[
<p>
$him[Voice rough, he asks, <p>"… could you be more specific?"] (live: 4s)[(stop:)
<p>
$her[“How you….” [My mind struggles to finish the sentence]<c4|. (click:?c4)[ I settle for, "|c5>[hurt me]?”]] (click:?c5)[
<p>
He’s quiet again. Contemplative.
<p>
$him[ (live: 3s)[(stop:)<p>“I punched you in the chest." <p>
"[[You were 8, I was… 13->brother 1.4]]?”]
]]]]]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
<img src= "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ezgif-1-3d3d82db49.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[BROTHER]
</div>}{
<div class="div1"> </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
You knocked the wind out of me. I collapsed onto the floor, gasping, in tears, trying my hardest to force air [back into my lungs]<lungs|.(click:?lungs)[ You brought me half a mango as an [apology]<apology| and begged me not to tell Mom. (click:?apology)[
<p>
I don't remember what I said, only your reaction and subsequent revulsion when you realized just how much it [hurt me]<hurt|. (click:?hurt)[(text-color:"#343434")[//Your little sister, how could you hurt your little sister?// ] ] (click:?hurt)[
<p>
You promised it would never happen again. <p> [You made that promise a hundred times.]<promise| (click:?promise)[
<p>
(link:"...")[[[That’s not it.->brother 1.5]]]]
]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
(click:?c1)[handler.jpg] </div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> <img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[SISTER] </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
$her["[That’s not it.]<c1|"] (click:?c1)[
<p>
$him[“Oh. Was it something like that?”] (live: 3s)[(stop:)
<p>
$her[My eyes burn. “[I guess.]<c2|”] (click:?c2)[
<p>
$him[“It happened a lot.”] (live: 3s)[(stop:)
<p>
$her[“[It did.]<c3|”] (click:?c3)[
<p>
$him[“It didn’t get better, did it?”] (live: 4s)[(stop:)
<p>
$her[“[No.]<c4|”] (click:?c4)[
<p>
$him[“When did we last speak? It feels like yesterday.”] (live: 4s)[(stop:)
<p>
$her[“[Years ago.]<c5|"(click:?c5)[// Lifetimes ago//. "[What do you remember?]<c6|”]] (click:?c6)[
<p>
$him[“[Our last conversation ended in screaming.]<c7| (click:?c7)[ You wanted to leave. You did leave. [I hated you for it.]<c8|”](click:?c8)[ <p>His voice wavers. (live: 2s)[(stop:)<p>“[[She needed us.->brother 1.6]]”]
]]]]]]]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
<img src= "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ezgif-1-3d3d82db49.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[BROTHER] </div>}{
<div class="div1"> </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
Age 18. I’d gotten accepted into a big name university, scholarship and all. My chance at [freedom]<free|. (click:?free)[(text-color:"#343434")[ (Three months earlier, Mom got diagnosed with lung cancer. You argued we both needed to be there to support her. And maybe if things were normal and nice, I would’ve agreed. But they weren’t, so I didn’t.)] ] (click:?free)[
<p>
She died before I could visit, so I never did. [If I never come back, she's not really dead]<since|. (click:?since)[(text-color:"#343434")[<p>(Well, I'm here now. I took too long and now everyone but me is gone, but I'm here.)]] (click:?since)[
<p>
(link:"...")[(live: 2s)[(stop:) [You left first.]<first| (click:?first)[
<p>
(text-color:"#343434")[Age 13. You joined the army at 18 and abandoned me for four years. I hated you for it. And I never got an apology. I never got a reason. I needed you. ][I needed you, and you left.]<left| (click:?left)[
<p> (live: 2s)[(stop:)
[[That’s not it, either.->brother 1.7]]]
]
]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
(click:?c1)[handler.jpg] </div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> <img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[SISTER] </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
$her[“I said I was |c1>[sorry].” (click:?c1)[//(text-color:"#343434")[Sorry]// tastes like ash on my tongue. //(text-color:"#343434")[I owe her my life and my name.] [What do I owe you?]<c2|//]] (click:?c2)[
<p>
//(text-color:"#343434")[Nothing.] [Everything.]<c3|// (click:?c3)[
<p>
$him[“Did you mean it?”] (live: 2s)[(stop:)
<p>
$her[“[No.]<c4|” (text-color:"#343434")[//At least I said it. At least I pretend//.] ] (click:?c4)[
<p>
$him[“I had nobody without you. Why…” ] (live: 3s)[(stop:)
<p>
[A gurgle, wet and terrible.]<c5| (click:?c5)[ His flesh drags against the table, mirroring my own rhythmic tapping. Lost in thought. He doesn’t finish his question. (link-reveal:"I reply,")[
<p>
$her[“It's in there, somewhere.”] (live: 3s)[(stop:)
<p>
(link-reveal:"More silence.")[ I imagine his face scrunching up like it used to when we were kids, and he thought //real hard// about something-or-other. (link-reveal:"Bloated skin pulling taut, guided by fragments of muscle memory.")[
<p>
$him[ [[He says nothing more.->brother 1.75]] ]
]]]]]]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
<img src= "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ezgif-1-3d3d82db49.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[BROTHER]</div>}{<div class="div2">
(align:"=><=")+(box:"=XXXXXXXXXXXX=")[[
Where would you go <p>
if you were a shambling corpse <p>
barely hanging on to your (text-style:"fidget")[previous life]<corpse|?]] (align:"<==>")+(box:"=XXXXXXXXX=")[
=|=
(click:?corpse)[
If the only thing you had left was a little sister who grew
up knowing (text-style:"fidget")[her blood ]<blood|
would feed your field.]
=||||=
=|=
(click:?blood)[It haunts (text-style:"fidget")[her]<her| dreams with saints made of stained glass and unan
swered prayers of repen
tance. ]
|==|
(click:?her)[  She loves you. [[She cannot look you in the eye.->churchpreamble2]]
]
<p> ]
</div>}{<div class="div2"> (align:"=><=")+(box:"=XXXXXXXXXXXX=")[[Where would you go <p>if you were a shambling corpse <p>barely hanging on to your (text-style:"fidget")[previous life]<corpse|?] ] (align:"<==>")+(box:"=XXXXXXXXX=")[
=|=
[If the only thing you had left was a little sister who grew
up knowing [her blood ]<blood|
would feed your field.]
=||||=
{<p>(text-style:"fidget")[Was I supposed to accept my fate?]<c1| (click:?c1,(action:'mouseover'))[ (text-style:"fidget")[Play my role like the hundred times we practiced?]<c2|(click:?c2,(action:'mouseover'))[ (text-style:"fidget")[Would you have wept when my body stilled for good?]<c3| (click:?c3,(action:'mouseover'))[(text-style:"fidget")[Would you have begged for forgiveness as my corpse struggled to remember?]<c4|(click:?c4,(action:'mouseover'))[ [[Would you burn my remains, too?->churchpreamble3]] ]]]]}
</p>
=|=
[It haunts [her]<her| dreams with saints made of stained glass and unan
swered prayers of repen
tance. ]
|==|
[  She loves you. She cannot look you in the eye.
]
<p> ]
</div> }<div class="div4">(align:"<==>")+(box:"=XXXXXXXXX=")[
=|=
=||||=
<p>
(text-style:"fidget")[I know where you are.]<c1| (click:?c1,(action:'mouseover'))[
(text-style:"fidget")[There is a hole in my head]<c2| (click:?c2,(action:'mouseover'))[
(text-style:"fidget")[everything grows around.]<c3|(click:?c3,(action:'mouseover'))[
(text-style:"fidget")[Fields of green you called]<c4|(click:?c4,(action:'mouseover'))[
(text-style:"fidget")[your own, where you led]<c5|(click:?c5,(action:'mouseover'))[
(text-style:"fidget")[and I followed.]<c6|(click:?c6,(action:'mouseover'))[
(text-style:"fidget")[Lessons embedded in my]<c7|(click:?c7,(action:'mouseover'))[
(text-style:"fidget")[mind, history you were]<c8|(click:?c8,(action:'mouseover'))[
(css: "background-color:black;")[[[determined to repeat.->churchpreamble4]] ]]]]]]]]]
</p>
=|=
|==|
[
]
<p> ]
</div>{
<div class="div1"> </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
|C>[WHERE IS HE?] (click:?C)[ <p>
=|=
[|place1>[A PLACE <p>YOU LEFT BEHIND.</p>] ]
=|=
(click:?place1)[[|place2>[A PLACE<p> I AM TRAPPED.</p>] ] ]<p>
|==|
<p><p>
(click:?place2)[[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/blank.gif">]<A|]
(click:?A)[(replace:?A)[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/chapel1.gif"> (live: 4.5s)[(stop:) (go-to:"church0")] ]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
(click:?c1)[handler.jpg] </div>}
{
<div class="div1"> </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
I found him at dusk, waiting before the remains of a pulpit. I don’t know what happened to this place.(link-reveal:" Maybe he did, once.")[
<p>
In a church next to a cemetery, surrounded by an overgrown field and a rusted chain-link fence, is [a room of many pews]<pew|.(click:?pew)[ (text-color:"#343434")[Half destroyed, half covered in dust. In the infancy of its abandonment.] The last light of the day filters through the windows, bathing [the room]<room|(click:?room)[ (text-color:"#343434")+(text-style:"fidget")[— and him—]] in (link-reveal:"gold.")[
<p>
(text-style:"fidget")[[[I have been here many times.->church2]] ]
]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
</div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> <img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"> <p>(css: "background-color:black;")[NEXT OF KIN]</div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
The handler is quiet as she leads me out of the room, through the building, and back to the door. (link-reveal:"She asks,")[
<p>
$him[ [“Will you be back tomorrow?” ]<tmrw|] (click:?tmrw)[
<p>
And my tongue is too heavy to reply. (live: 3s)[(stop:)
<p>
$her[ [I shake my head yes. ]<shake|] (click:?shake)[
<p>
$him[“Miss Alvarez…”] (live: 2s)[(stop:)
<p>
(link:"//I hope he finds what you’re looking for//")[(link:"//I hope something helps.//")[(link:"//I hope you can leave him behind.//")[(link:"//But you won’t be able to.//")[ $him[["Take care of yourself."->hotel1]]]]]]]]]]]
<p>
</div>
<div class="div3"> <img src ="https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/nurse.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[HIS HANDLER]
(click:?man)[<p>
<img src= "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ezgif-1-3d3d82db49.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[HIM]]
</div>}(live: 3s)[(stop:) (go-to:"brother 1.78")](live: 3s)[(stop:) (go-to:"brother 1.8")]{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
I drive back to my hotel in silence. (live: 3s)[ (go-to:"hotel2")]
</div>
<div class="div3">
(click:?man)[<p>
<p>(css: "background-color:black;")[HIM]]
</div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
[[I drive back to my hotel in silence. ->predream]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
(click:?man)[<p>
<p>(css: "background-color:black;")[HIM]]
</div>}(live: 2s)[ (go-to:"missing 1")]{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1">(click:?me)[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"> <p>INES ALVAREZ ]</div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
[He]<he| stands before [me]<me|, facing away and motionless. (link-reveal:"I say,")[
<p>
$her[[“You’re here.”]<here|] (click:?here)[
<p>
And he turns towards me, [in all of his rotten glory]<rot|.
(click:?rot)[<p>
His skin is yellow and gray, dark veins visible beneath its waxy surface. Tiny holes dot his face from burrowing maggots. One of his eyes is [gone]<gone|,(click:?gone)[ (text-color:"#343434")+(text-style:"fidget")[sunken into his skull,]] while the other (text-style:"fidget")[bulges] and [stares straight through me]<stare|.(click:?stare)[ The stench of rotten meat tears through my nostrils (link-reveal:"and makes my stomach churn.")[
<p>
(live: 2s)[(stop:)[ $him[(text-style:"fidget")["Ines?"]] (live: 2s)[(stop:)
<p>
Time has taken its toll. His voice is far hoarser. Black liquid drips from his mouth when he talks, coating his chin. [He can barely stand upright.]<upright| (click:?upright)[
<p>
$her[“[I thought you might be here.]<thought|” ] (click:?thought)[
<p>
$him[“(text-style:"fidget")[I’m sorry],” he spits, lurching forward. ](live: 4s)[(stop:)
<p>
I step back. It’s instinct. <p>[Nothing good ever happens when he’s close. ]<close| (click:?close)[
<p>
$him[“(text-style:"fidget")[//I’m sorry//],” he (cycling-link:"repeats","insists").<p> “[(text-style:"fidget")[For making you leave]]<leave|.” ] (click:?leave)[
<p>
$her[[“I know. It’s okay.”->church3]]
]]]]]]]]]]]]]
(click:?rot)[(replace:?c3)[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/brubber.gif"> <p> (text-style:"fidget")[(cycling-link:"MY BROTHER","THE PARASITE")]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
(click:?he)[ [<img src= "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ezgif-1-3d3d82db49.gif"><p>HIM]<c3| ]<p></div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1">[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"> <p>INES ALVAREZ ]</div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
It’s not. He’ll never understand that, though.
<p>
He opens his mouth and is interrupted by a |shudder>[full-body (text-style:"fidget")[shudder]]. (click:?shudder)[He stumbles, catches himself, then tilts his head. Continues staring at me like I’ll [take off running]<run|.(click:?run)[ (link-reveal:"I force myself to breathe evenly.")[
<p>
[What can I say to make things better?]<better| (click:?better)[ (live: 2s)[(stop:)
<p>
$her[ [“Do you want to go on a walk?”]<walk| (click:?walk)[ <p>
I ask gently, taking another step back. (live: 3s)[(stop:)
<p>
[“Like when we were kids?”]<kids|]]]] (click:?kids)[
<p>
It takes a moment to register, but [he nods]<nods|, slow and stiff. (click:?nods)[His lips split into a [smile]<smile|. (click:?smile)[
<p>
$him[“(text-style:"fidget")[That would be nice.]”]
<p>
(live: 3s)[(stop:) I swallow down rising vomit and [reply]<reply|, (click:?reply)[
<p>
$her[“[[Lead the way.->church4]]”]
<p>
]]]]]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/brubber.gif"> <p> (text-style:"fidget")[(cycling-link:"MY BROTHER","THE PARASITE")]<p></div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1">[]</div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
He passes me in an unsteady stride, allowing his remaining memories to pilot him out of the church and around to its backside. <p>
He doesn't notice when I linger behind for a moment. He doesn't notice when I bend down and take a piece of |rock>[debris] in my [hand]<hand|. (click:?rock)[
<p>
(text-color:"#343434")[(The stone fragment scrapes against my skin, (text-style:"fidget")[heavy and foreign]. An unfamiliar weight I was (text-style:"fidget")[never ]meant to know.) ]] (click:"hand")[
<p>
[[He says nothing when I rejoin him.->church4.5]]
]
</div>
<div class="div3">
</div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1">[ ]</div>
<div class="div2">
<p>
<p>
[$him[I'm sorry for everything.]]<sorry| (click-replace:?sorry)[$her[I'm sorry for everything.] ]
<p>
[$him[I want to live.]]<live| (click-replace:?live)[$her[ I want to live. ]
<p>
[$her[She's always loved you more.]]<sorry1| (click-replace:?sorry1)[$him[[["She's always loved you more."->church5.5]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
</div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1">[ ]</div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
(align:"<==>")+(box:"=X=")[
(text-color:"#343434")[ [There is a moment that stretches on forever.]<c1|
(click:?c1,(action:'mouseover'))[
<p>
[My body is weightless and my vision is blurred. ]<c2|
(click:?c2,(action:'mouseover'))[
<p>
[It smells like rotten fruit, sewage, raw meat festering beneath a hot sun. ]<c3|
(click:?c3,(action:'mouseover'))[
<p>
|c4>[My brother’s mouth moves, begging for his life.]
(click:?c4,(action:'mouseover'))[
<p>
(text-color:"yellow")[ [[The moment passes.->church7]]]
]]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
</div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1">[ ]</div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
$her[ [And my other hand comes down,]<down| (click:?down)[(link-reveal:" again")[(link-reveal:" and again")[ |dowm>[and again—]]]]] (click:?dowm)[
<p>
$him[And I think he gurgles out, (text-color:"#343434")[<p>//stop— please—//]] (live: 3s)[(stop:)
<p>
but I can hardly hear it over the sound of—
<p>
$her[(link-reveal:"Bared teeth")[(link-reveal:" and blood pounding ")[ |dowm2>[and the ache of my grip on your wrists.]]]]] ] (click:?dowm2)[
<p>
$her[[[ This is what it felt like. ->church8]] ]
]
</div>
<div class="div3">
<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/again.gif">
</div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1">[ ]</div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
$him[ [[Hands on my throat, crushing my windpipe, choking.->church9]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
</div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1">[ ]</div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
(text-color:"#343434")[$him[Hands on my throat, crushing my windpipe, choking.]]
<p>
$her[(link-reveal:"Again")[(link-reveal:" and again")[ [[and again—->church10]] ]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
<img src= "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/again%20and%20again.gif">
</div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1">[ ]</div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
$him[Hands on my throat, crushing my windpipe, choking.]
<p>
$her[(text-color:"#343434")[Again and again and again—]]
<p>
$her[[I don’t want to die. I stare up at the stars and pray you’ll stop—]<stop|] (click:?stop)[
<p>
[[You stopped, but I won’t.->church11]]
]
</div>
<div class="div3">
</div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1">[ ]</div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
$him[(text-color:"#343434")[Hands on my throat, crushing my windpipe, choking.]]
<p>
$her[Again and again and again—]
<p>
(text-color:"#343434")[$him[I don’t want to die. I stare up at the stars and pray you’ll stop—]]
<p>
(text-color:"#343434")[You stopped, but I won’t. I won’t give you another chance.]
<p>
$her[(link-reveal:"Black on my hands,")[(link-reveal:" his skull sunken in,")[ (link-reveal:"my brother—")[ (link-reveal:"oh god,")[ |again>[ my brother—!] ]]]]] (click:?again)[
<p>
$him[At least I knew how to [[stop->church12]]. ]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/again%20and%20again%20and%20again.gif">]<brother|
</div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1">[ ]</div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
The anger fades into a simmer, exhaustion settling deep. My grip loosens and the (cycling-link:"bloody stone","tool of sacrifice","first murder") slips from my [grasp]<grasp|.(click:?grasp)[ I pull myself from his [battered remains]<remain|.(click:?remain)[ I double over and [retch]<retch|(click:?retch)[ until I puke nothing but [stomach acid]<acid| and saliva]. (click:?acid)[
<p>
The acrid stench mixes with the [sweet rot]<rot| hanging in the air.(click:?rot)[ I (link-reveal:"shudder")[(link-reveal:" and cough")[(link-reveal:" and heave,")[ (link-reveal:"bracing myself.")[ My chest struggles to pull air back into |lung>[my lungs].(click:?lung)[ Blades of grass thread between my shaking fingers, [tearing like paper]<grass| as I curl them. ](click:?grass)[
<p>
I can’t bring myself to look at what remains, [but I know]<know|.(click:?know)[ His brain is [destroyed]<wreck|(click:?wreck)[(text-color:"#343434")[— its remains coat my hands alongside his rotting skin and congealed blood. They'll have to identify him by his teeth]]. (click:?wreck)[Pieces of (link:"him")[my brother] are flecked on (link-reveal:"my clothes,")[(link-reveal:" my face,")[(link-reveal:" my skin.")[ In my [blood]<blood|.(click:?blood)[(text-color:"#343434")[ No matter how hard I scrub, I will never be clean.]] (click:?blood)[
<p>
[[He is dead. I am no less alone.->after2]]
]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
</div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1">[ ]</div>
<div class="div2"> (live: 2s)[(stop:)
<p><p>
(link-reveal:"In the field,")[ <p>
(link-reveal:"beside my brother,")[ <p>
[[I lay on my back->after3]]
]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
</div>}(live: 2s)[(stop:)[<div class="div4"> (text-color:"black")+(font:"monospace")[
<p>[[What have you done?->cooldown 2]] ]<p>
</div>
]]<div class="div2"> [
[["What have you done?"->cooldown 3]] ]
</div>
<div class="div2"> (text-color:"gray")[
[[//What have you done?//->cooldown4]] ]
</div>
(live: 2s)[(stop:) (go-to:"church")]{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1">[]</div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
He passes me in an unsteady stride, allowing his remaining memories to pilot him out of the church and around to its backside. <p>
He doesn't notice when I linger behind for a moment. He doesn't notice when I bend down and take a piece of [debris] in my [hand].
<p>
(text-color:"#343434")[(The stone fragment scrapes against my skin, (text-style:"fidget")[heavy and foreign]. An unfamiliar weight I was (text-style:"fidget")[never ]meant to know.) ]
<p>
He says nothing when I rejoin him.
<p>
When we were kids, small kids, we’d play in the field between classes at Sunday school. We made daisy chains and whistled with blades of grass (link-reveal:"between our thumbs.")[ Green stained the hem of my nice dress and your button down, much to her annoyance. We played until it got dark, (link-reveal:"and then some.")[
<p>
And (link:"he")[you] walk in front of me now, (text-color:"#343434")[years older but still taking the same path]. And (link-reveal:"I")[(text-color:"#343434")[— years older, but still younger—]] walk behind like I did when I thought the world of you. Only now, there is no question of what will happen to [me]<beme|. (click:?beme)[
<p>
[[A hundred promises you always broke.->church5]]
]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
</div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
[[My mind returns to where it happened.->predream2]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
(click:?man)[<p>
<p>(css: "background-color:black;")[HIM]]
</div>}<div class="div1"> (live: 3s)[(stop:) <img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ines%20young.gif"> ] </div>
(live: 6s)[(stop:) (go-to:"dream 1.6")]{<div class="div2">
<p><p>
(live: 2s)[(stop:)[ It doesn't. (live: 3s)[(stop:)[(go-to:"interview 2.1")]]]]
</div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
[[It doesn't ->interview 2.2]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
(click:?man)[<p>
<p>(css: "background-color:black;")[HIM]]
</div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> (click:?me)[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[NEXT OF KIN]] </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p> (live: 2s)[(stop:)
The receptionist calls [my]<me| name, and the [same woman from yesterday]<c1| greets me. Her eyes look even more tired, somehow. Instead of reassurance, she prods at me with [well-placed small talk]<small|. (click:?small)[ No doubt trying to gauge my [mental state]<mental|.(click:?mental)[
<p>
$her[Whatever lies I spout [put her at ease]<ease|.]
<p>
(click:?ease)[ (text-color:"#343434")[It should be harder to fool her, right? ] (live: 3s)[(stop:)[
<p>
$him[Eventually, [she asks]<sheasks|,] (click:?sheasks)[
<p>
$him[[[“Were you two close?”->interview 2.3]]]]
]]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
(click:?c1)[<img src ="https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/nurse.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[HIS HANDLER]] </div>}(live: 3s)[ (go-to:"missing 1.1")]{
(align:"=><=")+(box:"==XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX==")[<div class="div6">
[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/switchblade.gif" > ]<blade| <p>
</div>
<div class="div7"> <p>
[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ciggy.gif"> ]<cig| <p>
</div>
<div class="div8">
[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/dog%20tags.gif">]<dog| <p>
</div>]
<p>
<div class="div9">
[]<blank|
(click-rerun:?dog)[(replace:?blank)[“I brought these back for you.”]]
(click-rerun:?cig)[(replace:?blank)[ “Just try it.”]]
(click-rerun:?blade)[(replace:?blank)[ “...”]]
</div> <p> (live: 9s)[(stop:)
(align:"=><=")+(box:"==XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX==")[[[Close it.->safe move on]] ]]
}
{
(align:"=><=")+(box:"==XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX==")[<div class="div6">
[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/switchblade.gif" >]<blade| <p>
</div>
<div class="div7"> <p>
[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ciggy.gif">]<cig| <p>
</div>
<div class="div8">
[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/dog%20tags.gif">]<dog| <p>
</div>]
<p>
<div class="div9">
[]<blank|
(click-rerun:?dog)[(replace:?blank)[“Why didn't you write me any letters?”]]
(click-rerun:?cig)[(replace:?blank)[ “It takes more than one to kill you.”]]
(click-rerun:?blade)[(replace:?blank)[ “Do you know how easy it would be?”]]
</div> <p> (live: 13s)[(stop:)
(align:"=><=")+(box:"==XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX==")[[[CLOSE IT.->safe move on2]] ]]
}
{
(align:"=><=")+(box:"==XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX==")[<div class="div6">
[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/switchblade.gif" >]<blade| <p>
</div>
<div class="div7"> <p>
[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ciggy.gif">]<cig| <p>
</div>
<div class="div8">
[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/dog%20tags.gif">]<dog| <p>
</div>]
<p>
<div class="div9">
[]<blank|
(click-rerun:?dog)[(replace:?blank)[Heavy around my neck. A constant reminder.]]
(click-rerun:?cig)[(replace:?blank)[ It makes my lungs seize. My eyes water and I cough, asking for water. You laugh and ignore me.]]
(click-rerun:?blade)[(replace:?blank)[ Cold metal against my throat. Pressing firmly, never breaking the skin. A warning. ]]
</div> <p> (live: 16s)[(stop:)
(align:"=><=")+(box:"==XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX==")[[[CLOSE IT!->safe move on3]] ]]
}
{(set:$safe to true)
<div class="div2"> <p><p>
The old pencilbox clicks shut. [I step away. ]<away| (click:?away)[
<p>
[He isn't here.]<here| There's no reason to linger. (click:?here)[
<p>
[I return to my car.]<car| (click:?car)[
(if:$safe and $familiar is true)[(go-to:"churchpreamble1")]
(else:)[(go-to:"missing 1.4")]
]]]
</div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> <img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"> </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
I wander inside. It’s dimly lit and nearly empty, save for [a woman bartending]<she|. She eyes me as I walk in, then grimaces from behind her cigarette. [I take a seat in front of her.]<i| (click:?i)[
<p>
$him["What’ll it be?"] (live: 2s)[(stop:)[
<p>
$her[“[Just water.]<water|” ] (click:?water)[
<p>
She lets out a sigh and gets to work. I take another [look]<look| around the bar. Still empty. [Filled with smoke.]<smoke| (if:$safe is true)[My lungs itch.](click:?smoke)[ She slides me my drink and goes back to [[ignoring me->gogogo1]].]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
(click:?she)[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/bartender.gif"><p>MISS BARTENDER ] </div>}
{(set:$familiar to true) (set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> <img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"> </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
$her[[“[...]<dot|(click:?dot)[ It’s fine. He’ll turn up eventually.]<c1|]"] (click:?c1)[
<p>
$him[“I’m sure he’ll come stumbling home, [drunk off his ass]<c2|." <p> (click:?c2)[
["If he’s that type,” she tacks on.]<c3| ]] (click:?c3)[
<p>
(text-color:"#414141")[//Most people who come here are that type//], <p>she thinks, [stealing another drag]<c4|. (click:?c4)[
<p>
$her[“That’s a bad habit.” I mumble. <p>“[Tars up your lungs.]<tar|”] (click:?tar)[
<p>
$him[She sighs. <p>“I’m trying to quit.”] (live: 2s)[(stop:)
<p>
$her[[[“Hope you’re able to.”->safeagain1]]]
]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/bartender.gif"><p>MISS BARTENDER ] </div>}
{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> (click:?me)[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ines2.gif">(css: "background-color:black;")[NEXT OF KIN ]] </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
When we were kids, Mom would kick us out of the house during the week so we’d get fresh air and sunshine. There wasn’t a bus stop by us, so we settled for walking half a mile into the woods behind our house, hand in hand. Cobwebs hit our face, poison ivy scraped our ankles, and ticks tried their damndest to bite us.
<p>
When we were kids, we found a [small clearing]<clearing| just off a hunting path. (click:?clearing)[ We propped up fallen branches and covered it with a [tarp]<tarp| stolen from the garage.(click:?tarp)[ It shielded us from the summer rain and shine, until a strong gust of wind collapsed it on top of us. [We’d always build it again. ]<again|] ](click:?again)[(go-to:"safe3")]
<p>
</div>
<div class="div3">
(click:?man)[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/man%20phone.gif">(css: "background-color:black;")[MISS BARTENDER]] </div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> (click:?me)[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ines2.gif">(css: "background-color:black;")[NEXT OF KIN ]] </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
When we were kids, Mom would kick us out of the house during the week so we’d get fresh air and sunshine. There wasn’t a bus stop by us, so we settled for walking half a mile into the woods behind our house, hand in hand. Cobwebs hit our face, poison ivy scraped our ankles, and ticks tried their damndest to bite us.
<p>
When we were kids, we found a small clearing just off a hunting path. We propped up fallen branches and covered it with a tarp stolen from the garage. It shielded us from the summer rain and shine, until a strong gust of wind collapsed it on top of us. We’d always build it again.
<p>
I’m not sure how I know where to go. The path is a tangle of bramble and moss, but muscle memory leads and I follow. Nothing remains of our old fort, save for a trace of dirty [blue plastic]<blue| beneath mulch. (click:?blue)[The tarp crinkles as I grab it and pull, flinging around dust and dirt and leaves. (link-reveal:"Bugs scuttle back to the shadows.")[(go-to:"safe4")]
]
</div>
<div class="div3">
(click:?man)[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/man%20phone.gif">(css: "background-color:black;")[MISS BARTENDER]] </div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> (click:?me)[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ines2.gif">(css: "background-color:black;")[NEXT OF KIN ]] </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
A small pencil box sits beneath it, half buried. (link-reveal:"The plastic is scratched and the color is faded.")[ A faded sticker declares it as (link-reveal:"THE PROPERTY OF INES J. ALVAREZ.")[
<p>
[[It opens without a problem.->safe]]
]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
(click:?man)[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/man%20phone.gif">(css: "background-color:black;")[MISS BARTENDER]] </div>}{<div class="div2">
[He has... <p><img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/brubber1.gif">]<c1|<p>
A kind smile.
(click:?c1)[(goto:"faces1")]
</div>}(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
</div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
|car>[I leave a twenty on the table and head back to my car.]
(click:?car)[
(if:$safe and $familiar is true)[(go-to:"churchpreamble1")]
(else:)[(go-to:"missing 1.4")]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
</div>
{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> <img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"> </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
$her[“Hey,” I take a sip. “Has anyone [weird]<c1| come by recently?”] (click:?c1)[
<p>
She shrugs. <p>
$him[“Just you. It’s usually pretty dead until [nine, ten-ish]<ten|.”](click:?ten)[ (live: 2s)[(stop:)[<p>$him[“[Are you a cop?]<cop|”]]]] (click:?cop)[
<p>
[I shake my head. ]<shake| (click:?shake)[
<p>
$her[“Just looking for someone. My… [brother]<bro|." <p> (click:?bro)[
"He likes this place, so I thought [maybe]<maybe|…” (click:?maybe)[
<p>
“[Well, guess I thought wrong.]<my|”]]] (click:?my)[
<p>
$him[“If he stops by, I'll let him know.”<p>[["What’s he look like?"->gogogo2]] ]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/bartender.gif"><p>MISS BARTENDER ] </div>}
{<div class="div2">
<p><p>
When we were kids, this place was a diner. We went to church with the owners. You and their son were [best friends]<friend|. You’d disappear for a weekend and go hunting, or fishing, or to stay the night. [Normal things.]<normal|<p> (text-color:"#343434")[I liked when you were gone.
<p>I fell asleep on the couch waiting for (text-color:"#414141")[you]<u| to return.]
<p>
When we were kids, the diner was decorated with talking fish and deer antlers. A mural of the Appalachian mountains stretched across the [back walls]<back|. (click:?back)[ Just behind the counter hung a collection of polaroids, candid shots of customers and friends, pictures of deer caracesses, [[kids in camo and work boots->mf2]].]
</div>
}{<div class="div2">
<p><p>
When we were kids, this place was a diner. We went to church with the owners. You and their son were [best friends]<friend|. You’d disappear for a weekend and go hunting, or fishing, or to stay the night. [Normal things.]<normal|<p> (text-color:"#343434")[I liked when you were gone.
<p>I fell asleep on the couch waiting for (text-color:"#414141")[you]<u| to return.]
<p>
When we were kids, the diner was decorated with talking fish and deer antlers. A mural of the Appalachian mountains stretched across the [back walls]<back|. Just behind the counter hung a collection of polaroids, candid shots of customers and friends, pictures of deer caracesses, [kids in camo and work boots].
<p>
The diner shut down when (link:"the son of the owners")[your best friend] ran away and died of an overdose. Not sure who bought it, gutted it, and turned it into something unrecognizable, but now it’s a [shitty bar]<bar| that plays shittier music. (click:?bar)[<p>The only place in town where you can get a decent hookup and enough alcohol to make you [[forget->go go go]]. ]
</div>
}<div class="div4">
</div><div class="div2"> (text-color:"white")[ (live: 2s)[(stop:)
[[I do not know.->after1]] ] ]
</div>
{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> (click:?me)[<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[NEXT OF KIN]] </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p> (text-color:"#343434")[
The receptionist calls [my]<me| name, and the [same woman from yesterday]<c1| greets me. Her smile is still kind, but her eyes look even more tired, somehow. Instead of reassurance, she prods at me with well-placed small talk. No doubt trying to gauge my mental state.
<p>
$her[Whatever lies I spout put her at ease.]
<p>
(text-color:"#343434")[It should be harder to fool her, right? ]
<p>
Eventually, she asks,
<p>
$him[“Were you two close?”] ]
<p>
(link-reveal:"Very close.")[ (link-reveal:"Too close.")[
<p>
[[There are hands on my throat.->interview 2.4]] ]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
(click:?c1)[<img src ="https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/nurse.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[HIS HANDLER]] </div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> [<img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[NEXT OF KIN]] </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
The receptionist calls [my]<me| name, and the [same woman from yesterday]<c1| greets me. Her eyes look even more tired, somehow. Instead of reassurance, she prods at me with well-placed small talk. No doubt trying to gauge my mental state.
<p>
$her[Whatever lies I spout put her at ease.]
<p>
It should be harder to fool her, right?
<p>
$him[Eventually, she asks,]
<p>
$him[“Were you close?”]
<p>
$her[“|close>[Yeah. Of course.]" (click:?close)[<p>"That’s why I’m here, [I guess]<who|." <p> ]] (click:?who)[
(text-color:"#343434")[Who else but me?] (live: 3s)[(stop:)[
<p>
She smiles and gives me her sympathies. <p> We return to the freezing room, where the clock is still behind and [the curtains are still drawn]<drawn|. (click:?drawn)[
(link-reveal:"It hasn’t changed.")[ [Why would it?]<would| ](click:?would)[
<p>
I remind myself to [stay cordial]<stay|.(click:?stay)[ (link-reveal:"Be kind.")[ (link-reveal:"It’s not his fault he doesn’t remember.")[ (link-reveal:"It’s //normal//.")[(link-reveal:" //It’s normal!//")[<p> [[Repeating something doesn’t make it true.->interview 2.5]] ]]]]]]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
[<img src ="https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/nurse.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[HIS HANDLER]] </div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> <img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[SISTER] </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
My chair scrapes against the floor as I sit down. [His silhouette shifts]<shift|(click:?shift)[, leaning closer to the thin glass [seperating us]<us|]. (click:?us)[
<p>
$him["You came back." <p>] (live: 2s)[(stop:)
He says it quietly, [almost too quiet]<quiet| for me to hear. ]] (click:?quiet)[
<p>
$her["[I had to eventually,]<joke|" I joke.]<p> (click:?joke)[
He doesn’t reply, just inhales sharply. I swear I can hear his [ribs creaking]<creak|.(click:?creak)[ Straining against the confines of [his chest]<chest|.(click:?chest)[ [<p>I purse my lips.]<purse|]]]] (click:?purse)[
<p>
$her["[Feeling any different?]<different|"] (click:?different)[
<p>
$him["I’m going to die soon,"
<p> [he mumbles]<mumble|. ]]](click:?mumble)[
<p>
$her["You’re already dead," I say. [I'm not trying to be reassuring.]<not|(click:?not)[ "The rest of you is just... [catching up.]<catching|"]]] (click:?catching)[
<p>
$him["Will you miss me?"] (live: 2s)[(stop:)
<p>
$her["[I don't know.]<idk|" ] ]](click:?idk)[
<p>
$him[ [["How do you not know?"->interview2.55]] ] ]
</div>
<div class="div3">
<img src= "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ezgif-1-3d3d82db49.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[BROTHER]
</div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> <img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[SISTER] </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
$her["[Maybe it’s better that you’re gone,]<maybe|"<p>
I don't mean to say it.] (click:?maybe)[
<p>
$him["[What?]<what|" His voice drops, low and trembling. (click:?what)["[Why would you...]<how|"]]] (click:?how)[
<p>
[I know that tone.]<tone|(click:?tone)[ It still sends a shock of ice through my veins. If I were younger, I’d shrink back and [apologize]<sorry| more times worth counting. (click:?sorry)[Praying for your forgiveness, devastated that [I upset you]<upset|.(click:?upset)[ Now, older (text-color:"#343434")[(but still younger than you)], |say>[I state], ]]] (click:?say)[
<p>
$her["You know why."
<p>
"It's in there, [[somewhere->interview2.65]]."] ]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
<img src= "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ezgif-1-3d3d82db49.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[BROTHER]
</div>}{<div class="div4">
By the later stage, the condition will have a severe impact on most aspects of a person’s life. A person’s spoken language may eventually be reduced to only a few words or lost altogether.
<p>
(css: "background-color:black;")[ [[>>>>>->medical2.2]] ]
</div>
}{<div class="div2">
[He has... <p><img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/brubber2.gif">]<c1|<p>
My eyes, my mother's eyes, my mother’s mother’s eyes…
(click:?c1)[(goto:"faces2")]
</div>}{<div class="div2">
[He has... <p><img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/brubber3.gif">]<c1|<p>
Something terrible just beneath the surface
(click:?c1)[(goto:"safeagain")]
</div>}{<div class="div4">
Aggression is often a reaction to personal care. Restlessness is also very common. Sometimes the person may seem to be searching for someone or something.
<p>
(css: "background-color:black;")[ [[>>>>>->medical2.3]] ]
</div>
}{<div class="div4">
It is important to look beyond the words or behaviors you see to the [feelings] that the person might be trying to express.
<p>
(css: "background-color:black;")[ [[>>>>>->medical2.4]] ]
</div>
}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"><img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"> <p>(css: "background-color:black;")[NEXT OF KIN] </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
$him[[And none of it helps.]<help|](click:?help)[
$her[[“Wait until he dies.”]<die|(click:?die)[ <p>“Then cremate (link:"him")[[the body]<body|].”] ](click:?body)[
<p>
(link-reveal:"I want him to waste away.")[ (link-reveal:"I want him to be afraid.")[
<p>
[[ I can't bear the thought of killing him.->hotel]]
]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3"><img src ="https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/nurse.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[HIS HANDLER] <p>
</div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
[[I drive back to my hotel in silence.->hotel2.2]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
</div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
[[I scream into my pillow and fall asleep.->dreambefore]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
</div>}(live: 3s)[(stop:) (go-to:"dreambefore2")] (live: 3s)[(stop:) (go-to:"dream 2.1")] {(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1">[ ]</div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
My body slams into (link:"you")[my brother, and sends him tumbling to the ground, |reel>[reeling].] (click:?reel)[ He doesn’t realize what’s going on, not until I climb atop and raise (link-reveal:"the rough stone over my head.")[ Something clicks, and the remains of his survival instinct (link-reveal:"switch on.")[
<p>
So he [fights back]<fight|, (click:?fight)[(text-color:"#343434")[//he tries to fight back, //]]but his muscles are jelly and his adrenaline is (link-reveal:"running on empty.")[ My hand (text-style:"fidget")[catches] his and [shoves it into the earth,]<pin|(click:?pin)[ pinning him down as he thrashes in desperation—[[ in fear->church6]].
<p>
]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
</div>}<div class="div2">
[[Again->church13]]
</div><div class="div2">
Again [[and again->church14]]
</div><div class="div2">
Again and again [[and again->church15]]
</div><div class="div2">
[[and...->cooldown1]]
</div>(live: 3s)[(stop:)<div class="div2">
(text-color:"yellow")[MY BROTHER ; THE PARASITE]
(live: 2s)[(stop:) by qrowscant <p>
(live: 2s)[(stop:) part two of
(live: 2s)[(stop:) "THE GROWING PAINS COLLECTION"
<p>
(live: 2s)[(stop:) Thank you for reading!
<p>
[[RESET->START]] || [[CREDITS]]
]]]
</div>]]{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1">[ ]</div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
In the field <p>
beside my brother <p>
I lay on my back <p>
[[and stare up at the stars.]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
</div>}<div class="div2">
(text-color:"white")[''CREDITS'']
written and drawn by qrowscant (me! thats me!)
<a href="https://qrowscant-art.tumblr.com/" target="_blank">tumblr</a> | <a href="https://twitter.com/qrowscant" target="_blank">twitter</a> | <a href="https://qrowscant.itch.io/" target="_blank">itchio</a> | <a href="https://ko-fi.com/qrowscant" target="_blank">ko-fi</a>
most backgrounds are sourced from "unsplash.com" and heavily modified by me, or from photos i took!
<p>
(text-color:"white")[SPECIAL THANKS TO:]
''peppergoji'' for playtesting!
<p>
[[BACK->fakecredits]]
</div><div class="div2">
(text-color:"yellow")[MY BROTHER ; THE PARASITE]
by qrowscant <p>
part two of
"THE GROWING PAINS COLLECTION"
<p>
Thank you for reading!
<p>
[[RESET->START]] || [[CREDITS]]
</div>{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
$her[Because I don't. It's not that simple. [You've never been that simple]<simple|.](click:?simple)[
<p>
Because I miss [mom]<mom|.(click:?mom)[ It's easy to miss her. (click:?mom)[ Because I miss being [small]<small|(click:?small)[, or at least when I understood less(click:?small)[ and the worst pain I knew was a [scraped knee]<knee|].]]]] (click:?knee)[ Because I do miss you, but not [//you//]<you|(click:?you)[, I miss the part of you that [taught me]<taught| how to tie my shoes or drive a car].] (click:?taught)[ I miss when you were sweet to [me]<sweet|.(click:?sweet)[ [ When you pretended to be.]<pretend| ]](click:?pretend)[
<p>
And it's not a question of [mourning]<mourn|.(click:?mourn)[ Because you're my brother. (click:?mourn)[ I'll always mourn you(click:?mourn)[, there will always be a piece of me that's missing now that you're [dead]<dead|.]]](click:?dead)[ Maybe that means [you aren't dead at all]<dead2|.]](click:?dead2)[
<p>
And it's not a question of [love]<love|.(click:?love)[ I love you more than anything and anyone in this world. (click:?love)[ It's unconditional.(click:?love)[ It's maddening.(click:?love)[ [ I wish I could rip out the love I have for you.]<love2| ]]]]] (click:?love2)[
<p>
Missing you, though? Really missing you? [I don't know.]<idk| ] (click:?idk)[
<p>
Maybe... (click:?idk)[
<p>
$her["[[Maybe it’s better that you’re gone,->interview 2.6]]"] ]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
</div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> <img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[SISTER] </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
He (cycling-link:"laughs","screams", "sobs"). His chair squeals as its shoved away, and something hits the glass in front of me with a [forceful thud]<thud|. (click:?thud)[ The window [shakes]<shake|(click:?shake)[— once(click:?shake)[, twice(click:?shake)[, thrice—(click:?shake)[ but [holds firm]<firm|]]]].](click:?firm)[ When he realizes it isn't breaking, [he coughs out]<cough|, ] (click:?cough)[
<p>
$him["I want to see you."<p> (click:?cough)[
"[I want to see you!]<cu|"]]] (click:?cu)[
<p>
$her["[No.]<naur|" ]] (click:?naur)[
<p>
$him["Isn't that why you're here? (live: 2s)[(stop:) I want to see you one last time before[ I…]<b4|"]]] (click:?b4)[
<p>
$her["[You’re already dead,]<ded|"
<p>I repeat, reminding myself. ]] (click:?ded)[
<p>
$him["I'm not— I'm not—"](live: 2s)[(stop:)
<p>
$him["[[//I'm still here.// ->interview 2.75]]"]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
[<img src= "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ezgif-1-3d3d82db49.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[BROTHER]]<bro|
[]<c1|
</div>}
{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"><img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"> <p>(css: "background-color:black;")[NEXT OF KIN] </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
[The door shuts behind me]<shut|(click:?shut)[, but I can still hear him |scream>[screaming].] (click:?scream)[Every muscle in my body is tense and aching, my mouth is a thin line that twitches into a frown. The nail of my thumb [digs into the tender flesh]<flesh| of my pointer finger. ] (click:?flesh)[
<p>
The handler is beside me, leading me away from [my brother and his outburst]<anger|.(click:?anger)[ Her eyes are wide. She hasn’t stopped (link:"apologizing")[[spouting excuses]<ex|]. (click:?ex)[
<p>
$him["|c1>[They don’t usually act like this.]"] (click:?c1)[
$him["|c2>[I’m sure it meant nothing.]"] (click:?c2)[
$him["|c3>[He loves you, this is just a big change.]"](click:?c3)[
$him[ "|c4>[[[Please keep in mind…->medical2.1]]]" ]]]]]]]
</div>
<div class="div3"><img src ="https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/nurse.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[HIS HANDLER] <p>
</div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> <img src = "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/iness%20gif.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[SISTER] </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
He takes [a moment]<moment| before he starts up.(click:?moment)[
<p>
$him["[We used to be so close.]<close|"](click:?close)[
<p>
$him["You slept in my bed when you were scared. (click:?close)[ You kicked in your sleep. (click:?close)[ You cried and begged me not to leave, (click:?close)[but [when I did]<left|]]..."] ]]] (click:?left)[
<p>
$him["You didn't write me a single letter. Mom said [you never wanted to see me again]<again|."] (click:?again)[
<p>
He's rambling now, the [holes in his brain]<hole| removing any filter. (click:?hole)[
<p>
$him["And that's when I thought, why did I try so hard to keep you [safe]<safe|?(click:?safe)[ Why did I do everything for you, (click:?safe)[ if you're just gonna throw it back in my face like some (link-reveal:"ungrateful,")[ (link-reveal:"//spoiled//")[ ''//[brat]<bitch|//''." ] ]]]]]]](click:?bitch)[
<p>
He doesn't need to breathe, but [I can hear him gasping]<gasp|.(click:?gasp)[ (text-color:"#343434")[If his blood vessels still worked, he'd be red in the face.]](click:?gasp)[ Voice rough and dripping with malice, [he spits out]<spit|,]] (click:?spit)[
<p>
$him["I should've killed you. [I had so many chances.]<chance|(click:?chance)[ I should've killed you—"]] (click:?chance)[
<p>
And I interject, (live: 1s)[(stop:)
<p>
$her[ "[[That’s why.->interview2.7]]" ]
]
]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
<img src= "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ezgif-1-3d3d82db49.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[BROTHER]
</div>}{(set: $him to (align:"==>")+(box:"========XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX=")) (set: $her to (align:"<==")+(box:"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX========"))
<div class="div1"> </div>
<div class="div2">
<p><p>
<p>
[$him[//Why am I still here?//]]<guh| (click-replace:?guh)[$her[ [[[//Why am I still here?//->interview 2.7]]]<who| (replace:?bro)[]]]
</div>
<div class="div3">
[<img src= "https://raw.githubusercontent.com/qrowscant/projjy/main/ezgif-1-3d3d82db49.gif"><p>(css: "background-color:black;")[BROTHER]]<bro| []<buh|
</div>}
↶↷written and illustrated by qrowscant
| START |
| CONTENT WARNINGS |