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18

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7853 780 0 0 0 0 11100 0

"AUT" "ANY"
"GO" "NORT"
"*ENTE" "SOUT"
"*FOLL" "EAST"
"*RUN" "WEST"
"*WALK" "UP"
"INVE" "DOWN"
"SCOR" "INVE"
"SAVE" "GAME"
"LOOK" "WARD"
"TAKE" "ROBE"
"*GET" "DAGG"
"QUIT" "DOOR"
"OPEN" "OUT"
"EXAM" "OPHE"
"*READ" "BERN"
"*X" "FRAN"
"YELL" "QUEE"
"LEAV" "*GERT"
"*DROP" "CLAU"
"TALK" "*RAT"
"*ASK" "*ARRA"
"*HELL" "*MAN"
"KILL" "POLO"
"*STAB" "*GUTS"
"*LUNG" "*CORP"
"WRIT" "WILL"
"*BEQU" "*TEST"
"*TELL" "*INST"
"TO" "*DENM"
"CHEE" "FORT"
"*APPL" "*NORW"
"*CLAP" "HORA"
"GIVE" "PLAY"
"BUY" "SCRI"
"TRIC" "GHOS"
"*FOOL" "*KING"
"MONO" "STAI"
"*SOLI" "FLOW"
"DRIN" "SAIL"
"CLEN" "SHIP"
"KISS" "GRAV"
"*LOVE" "SKUL"
"*FUCK" "WATE"
"*SCRE" "*BOTT"
"POIS" "FIST"
"ADMI" "BOOK"
"MACB" "LAER"
"SLEE" "GOBL"
"*DREA" "*CUP"
"HELP" "*POIS"
"*HINT" "FOIL"
"BEAR" "FAIL"
"" "HAML"
"" "MONE"
"" "INKP"
"" "*PAD"
"" "CAPE"
"" "PEN"
"" "PAPE"
"" "SEAL"
"" "RING"
"" "CROW"
"" "XYZC"

0 0 0 0 0 0 ""
0 0 0 0 0 0 "*My princely bedroom"
7 1 0 4 0 0 "Hallway"
0 0 0 8 0 7 "Watchtower"
0 0 2 5 0 0 "Royal Bedroom"
0 0 4 0 0 0 "*My auntmother Gertrude's closet"
0 0 7 16 0 0 "Treasury"
10 2 9 6 3 0 "Grand Room"
0 0 3 0 0 0 "Platform overlooking Elsinore Village"
0 14 0 7 0 0 "Throne Room"
11 7 0 0 0 0 "Castle Gates"
15 10 13 12 0 0 "*Elsinore village. Famous FLOWER SHOPS"
0 0 11 0 0 0 "Docks"
0 0 0 11 0 0 "Cemetery"
9 0 0 0 0 0 "Chapel complete with font"
0 11 0 0 0 0 "Polonius Manor"
0 0 6 0 0 0 "Library"
0 0 0 0 0 0 "Tourney Room"
0 0 0 0 0 0 "Purgatory, be JUDGED by your FATHER!"

""
"Drink deep ere you depart!"
"Welcome to GHOST KING S.A.L.A.D. #1
Scott Adams Literary Adventure Diversions
This should have been 1980's hottest game

I am PRINCE HAMLET
My father is DEAD, KILLED by my unclefather
What are we going to DO about it?
"
"It's DEPRESSING"
"PLENTY sharp"
"Too sad, need protection"
"UH OH Ophelia tracked me down again
Looks VERY upset now
'I was the more deceived!'"
"Ophelia THROWS herself at my feet!
I TRIP and break my NECK!"
"*GET THEE TO A NUNNERY!* I shout
she SHRIEKS back 'I was the more deceived! O woe is me!'
and runs away"
"Stand HO! Who's THERE?"
"Have you had QUIET guard"
"When I'm upset I CLENCH FIST to calm down"
"How are you, beautiful?"
"Mother has a LOT to answer for!"
"I hear WHISPERS in the queens chamber"
"'What wilt thou do? Thou wilt not murder me?!'
Calls HELP"
"Too mean"
"feels so GOOD!
A man behind the arras shouts HELP
It must be that rat CLAUDIUS!
In the incestuous pleasure of his bed!"
"*DEAD FOR A DUCAT!*
Wait NOT CLAUDIUS at all!
I killed Polonius, Ophelia's dad
'What a RASH and BLOODY deed!' Gertrude runs away!
Time to LUG THE GUTS!"
"The guards link me to Polonius' body!
I am EXECUTED!"
"*The body is with the King
but the King is not with the body*
Polonius disappears over the side!
Dropped something
I see a crowd near the cemetery"
"'Anon he finds him striking too short!'"
"'The bold winds SPEECHLESS'"
"'This is too long!'"
"Here sweet lord at your SERVICE"
"No thanks"
"Need a witness"
"My lord I cannot properly witness without my SEAL
I have misplaced it!"
"To whom? (type TO NAME)"
"Horatio is SHOCKED 'Young Fortinbras?!
Of unimproved mettle hot and full?!'
*DENMARK'S A PRISON Fortinbras is WELCOME to it!*
he SEALS the will and solemnly files it
'Take this inkpad, my lord. Twas never mine
and never shall I notarize again!'"
"An unworthy choice! *What an ass am I!*"
"*Break my heart for I must hold my tongue!*
I COLLAPSE into melancholy and NEVER recover"
"A weighty matter for pen paper and willing WITNESS"
"'I am more an antique Roman than a Dane
Here's yet some liquor left' he REACHES for the goblet
*GIVE ME the cup! Let go by heaven I'll have't!*"
"I must to POLONIUS MANOR and seal some legal
business pertaining to their deaths
More in sorrow than in anger!"
"My lord I think I saw him yesternight
a FIGURE like your FATHER!"
"He looks SAD!
'You will lose this wager my lord'
*THE READINESS IS ALL*"
"I fear for Denmark with young Fortinbras of Norway
and his shark'd up list of lawless resolutes
if only I knew your WILL"
"'And PASSION in the GODS.'
They look disappointed"
"They bow and look VERY happy!"
"We accept commissions my lord"
"We can play the MURDER OF GONZAGO!
They exit to the throne room
The play is ABOUT to begin!"
"Too SLIPPERY! I FALL!"
"If thou didst ever thy dear father love--
Revenge his foul and most unnatural murder
Send Claudius to HELL
And bring me the *treasures* of my ENEMIES!"
"A ghostly voice cries SWEAAAAAARRRRR!"
"Wrong WAY!
I feel a blood vessel go *POP*
and collapse in embarrassment!"
"The PRETENDER, my unclefather"
"My mother who married my uncle who killed my FATHER!"
"Good Hamlet cast thy nighted colour OFF"
"Just BEING here makes me SO ANGRY"
"The court assembles to watch
The players act the MURDER of GONZAGO
The evil BROTHER poisons the good KING
Claudius SCREAMS and runs to the chapel
*HA! I did very well note him!*
Servants call LIGHTS and all scatter"
"Rosencrantz & Guildenstern here, WHY?!
'If you delight not in man, what lenten entertainment
the players shall receive from you. They are coming 
to offer you service!' They SLITHER away"
"OSRIC here with a DUEL CHALLENGE!
The king hath wagered with LAERTES
he will not exceed you three hits
It would come to immediate trial!
meet for tourney beneath the throne"
"Rosencrantz & Guildenstern return
'Everything is bent for England
Come away with us, lord!'"
"very pretty DAnish flowers!"
"Rosencrantz & Guildenstern practically
SHOVE me onto the ship!"
"YOHO!"
"I borrow Rosencrantz's pen and
FORGE LETTERS showing he & Guildenstern
are TRAITORS to be marked for death
Sailor takes my FALSE FRIENDS to England without me!"
"Rosencrantz & Guildenstern grab me
and force me aboard the ship. We sail for England
where I learn Claudius conspired to
ARRANGE MY EXECUTION there!"
"What the fair Ophelia?! I loved her!"
"My gorge rises at it"
"*Alas poor Yorick! I knew him Horatio
To what base uses we may return!*

funeral procession comes. BURYS Ophelia
Her brother Laertes YELLS as he leaves
'THE DEVIL TAKE THY SOUL!'"
"*Now might I do it pat!* But I brought NO weapon!
I feel a blood vessel go *POP* and collapse in embarrassment!"
"Claudius KNEELS and PRAYS!
He does not see me, *now might I do it pat!*

UH-OH! Feel a tickle in my throat!"
"I *COUGH* noisily! SPOOKS Claudius!
He crashes into the font where I hide
It falls and CRUSHES me"
"Stabbed him! Feels GOOD!
But I killed him as he prayed
And sent this same villain to Heaven!
Guards arrive to dispatch me, I DIE in eternal SHAME"
"Throat feels better WHEW!
oh no TERRIBLE thought
*This is hire and salary, not revenge!*
HOW can I resist??"
"CAN'T resist anymore!"
"It WORKED! I am more calm now
But he took my father GROSSLY
feel so torn!"
"*Am I then reveng'd when he is FIT
and SEASONED for his passage? No!
UP, sword! Prolong thy sickly days*

Claudius mumbles amen and SKULKS off"
"Ophelia looks VERY happy to see me"
"GOOD idea!
Or maybe not! She's so DEMANDING!"
"She runs off crying! WHEW!
Dropped something"
"Try something softer first"
"Importune me with love"
"I did love her once"
"Messenger brings news that NORWAYS FORTINBRAS marches
on Poland. *Witness this army of such MASS and CHARGE
I see the imminent DEATH of twenty thousand men!*"
"Too distracted now, try later"
"Words words words
Paper I used as a bookmark FALLS out!"
"Wild and WHIRLING words"
"Play script: The MURDER of GONZAGO!
about fratricide & other TERRIBLE acts
CLAUDIUS is also guilty of!"
"The duel is SET. Claudius summons CUPS
tosses a pearl in one 'to thy health'
Laertes picks a sharp FOIL of a length
'Come MY LORD' he says. ENGARDE!"
"We trade blows but more important we trade WEAPONS!
'Part them they are incensed!'
Queen drinks, Claudius looks NERVOUS!"
"'O yet defend me friends!'
I FORCE the poison down CLAUDIUS throat!
*FOLLOW MY MOTHER*
He dies AT LAST"
"Laertes COLLAPSES
'I am justly kill'd with mine OWN treachery!
The king! the kings to blame!'

Gertrude CRUMPLES 'The drink! O my dear Hamlet!'"
"'they bleed on both sides!'
the QUEEN looks SAD"
"'A very palpable hit!' says OSRIC
Laertes scores back with his FOIL
The wound BURNS!"
"The poison OVERCOMES me
*I DIE Horatio! Tell my story!*

sound of a DRUM then all is dark"
"I feel WEAKER"
"Looks FISHY to me"
"My hour is almost come
Drop treasures and SCORE
or ADMIT FAILURE"
"You are proved duller than the fat weed
that rots itself in ease!"
"Danish tragedy, not GREEK!"
"This is no DREAM its a serious tragedy!"
"Angels and ministers of grace defend us"
"*I could be bounded in a nut shell and
count myself a king of infinite space
were it not that I have bad DREAMS*"
"What, art a heathen?
Try reading HAMLET!"
"I assume the pose, nothing comes out"
"Pretty ordinary Danish"

"Wardrobe" 1
"*Robe*/ROBE/" 0
"Dagger/DAGG/" 0
"Closed door" 1
"Open door leads out" 0
"Bernardo" 3
"Francisco" 3
"couch for luxury & damned incest" 4
"Money/MONE/" 6
"Horatio" 7
"*Guildenstern inkpad*/INKP/" 0
"Players" 0
"GHOST of King Hamlet!" 8
"Staircase to Tourney Room" 0
"Queen Gertrude" 0
"Claudius" 0
"Dead Polonius/POLO/" 0
"*Polonius Cape*/CAPE/" 0
"Osric pointing to the TOURNEY STAIRS" 0
"Flowers/FLOW/" 0
"Sailor" 12
"*Rosencrantz Pen*/PEN/" 0
"blank paper/PAPE/" 0
"Ship" 0
"*Skull*/SKUL/" 0
"Ophelia's GRAVE" 0
"Rank offense SMELLS to HEAVEN" 0
"Water bottle/WATE/" 0
"Ophelia" 0
"Notary seal/SEAL/" 0
"Book/BOOK/" 16
"Script/SCRI/" 0
"Laertes" 17
"POISONED Goblet/GOBL/" 0
"*Queens ring*/RING/" 0
"*Laertes foil*/FOIL/" 0
"*THE CROWN*/CROW/" 0
"a pair of corpses" 0
"a pile of bodies" 0
"Affectionate tribute pastiche of W Shakespeare and S Adams by J Compton-test thanks to JJ Guest-Laura BK-Henrik A-Karona-Mike C-ahope1-Dokken-pdxiv-created in Mike T's ScottKit/XYZC/" 0

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