DECLARE SUB hints () DECLARE SUB help () 'So I Mangled My Mom 'by Aaron Oldenburg '1995 begin.yes.no: CLS PRINT "Type everything in lowercase." PRINT PRINT "Which part would you like to go to (1/2/3)?" INPUT "(If beginning a new game, choose 1)", a IF a = 1 THEN GOTO begin.new IF a = 2 THEN CLS : cbs = 1: hsniffy = 1: hguilty = 1: GOSUB 21: GOSUB 23: GOTO question IF a = 3 THEN CLS : yhc = 1: nis = 1: GOSUB 43: GOSUB 44: GOTO question GOTO begin.yes.no begin.new: CLS PRINT TAB(30); "Part I" PRINT PRINT "Your mother glares at you from the backseat of the taxi. You glare" PRINT "back at her through the rearview mirror. Turning the wheel slightly" PRINT "to the side, you veer off the highway, into the park. Headlight" PRINT "beams illuminate a barn and then a dense forest as you slow." PRINT PRINT "Although you try to avoid it, your eyes look in the mirror and" PRINT "glimpse your mother in the backseat. Without warning, she shoves her" PRINT "fingernail into her eye. As you stare in surprise she applies her" PRINT "other hand, now wrinkled, with claws, to the side of her head. A" PRINT "liquid oozes down her finger. Her skin peels as she pulls her hand" PRINT "away from her face. There is now no skin on her head. Her legs" PRINT "shorten. Able to avert your eyes, you jump into the backseat. While" PRINT "something is screaming at you not to let her go, you open the rear" PRINT "door." PRINT PRINT "She's gone and you're now in the driver's seat, again. The only way" PRINT "to go is out, so you exit the car, leaving on your headlights." GOSUB 22 CLS LOCATE 9, 30 PRINT "So I Mangled My Mom" PRINT PRINT TAB(39); "by" PRINT PRINT TAB(32); "Aaron Oldenburg" PRINT TAB(34); "August 1995" GOSUB 22 in.the.beginning: CLS GOSUB 1 question: PRINT LINE INPUT a$ GOSUB answer GOTO question answer: PRINT IF a$ = "exit" OR a$ = "quit" THEN GOSUB the.end: RETURN IF LEFT$(a$, 4) = "park" AND cbs = 1 AND loy = 2 THEN GOSUB 19: RETURN IF LEFT$(a$, 4) = "park" AND cbs = 1 AND loy = 3 THEN GOSUB 19: RETURN IF LEFT$(a$, 7) = "highway" AND cbs = 1 AND loy = 4 THEN GOSUB 19: RETURN IF LEFT$(a$, 8) = "backyard" AND cbs = 1 AND loy = 11 THEN GOSUB 19: RETURN IF a$ = "" AND loy = 1 THEN GOSUB 1: RETURN IF a$ = "" AND loy = 2 THEN GOSUB 14: RETURN IF a$ = "" AND loy = 3 THEN GOSUB 4: RETURN IF a$ = "" AND loy = 4 THEN GOSUB 44: RETURN IF a$ = "" AND loy = 5 THEN GOSUB 23: RETURN IF a$ = "" AND loy = 6 THEN GOSUB 24: RETURN IF a$ = "" AND loy = 7 THEN GOSUB 27: RETURN IF a$ = "" AND loy = 8 THEN GOSUB 33: RETURN IF a$ = "" AND loy = 9 THEN GOSUB 29: RETURN IF a$ = "" AND loy = 10 THEN GOSUB 31: RETURN IF a$ = "" AND loy = 11 THEN GOSUB 38: RETURN IF a$ = "" AND loy = 12 THEN GOSUB 40: RETURN IF a$ = "" AND loy = 13 THEN GOSUB 50: RETURN IF a$ = "" AND loy = 14 THEN GOSUB 67: RETURN IF a$ = "" AND loy = 15 THEN GOSUB 54: RETURN IF a$ = "where" THEN GOSUB 84: RETURN IF a$ = "barn" AND loy = 1 THEN CLS : GOSUB 14: RETURN IF a$ = "highway" AND loy = 1 THEN CLS : GOSUB 2: PRINT : GOSUB 4: RETURN IF a$ = "park" AND loy = 2 THEN CLS : GOSUB 1: RETURN IF a$ = "park" AND loy = 3 THEN CLS : GOSUB 1: RETURN IF a$ = "bus" AND loy = 3 THEN CLS : GOSUB 44: RETURN IF a$ = "highway" AND loy = 4 THEN CLS : GOSUB 6: PRINT : GOSUB 4: RETURN IF a$ = "inside" AND loy = 5 THEN CLS : GOSUB 24: RETURN IF a$ = "outside" AND loy = 6 THEN CLS : GOSUB 23: RETURN IF a$ = "kitchen" AND loy = 6 THEN CLS : GOSUB 27: RETURN IF a$ = "waiting room" AND loy = 6 THEN CLS : GOSUB 29: RETURN IF a$ = "refrigerator" AND loy = 7 THEN CLS : GOSUB 33: RETURN IF a$ = "stairs" AND loy = 7 THEN CLS : GOSUB 24: RETURN IF a$ = "kitchen" AND loy = 8 THEN CLS : GOSUB 27: RETURN IF a$ = "outside" AND loy = 9 THEN CLS : GOSUB 31: RETURN IF a$ = "stairs" AND loy = 9 THEN CLS : GOSUB 24: RETURN IF a$ = "inside" AND loy = 10 THEN CLS : GOSUB 29: RETURN IF a$ = "backyard" AND loy = 11 THEN CLS : GOSUB 40: RETURN IF a$ = "driveway" AND loy = 12 THEN CLS : GOSUB 38: RETURN IF a$ = "pool" AND loy = 13 THEN CLS : GOSUB 67: RETURN IF a$ = "monument" AND loy = 13 THEN CLS : GOSUB 54: RETURN IF a$ = "garden" AND loy = 14 THEN CLS : GOSUB 50: RETURN IF a$ = "garden" AND loy = 15 THEN CLS : GOSUB 50: RETURN IF a$ = "door" AND loy = 2 AND diul = 1 THEN CLS : GOSUB 50: RETURN IF LEFT$(a$, 4) = "look" THEN GOSUB look: RETURN IF LEFT$(a$, 3) = "use" THEN GOSUB use: RETURN IF LEFT$(a$, 4) = "take" THEN GOSUB take: RETURN IF LEFT$(a$, 4) = "talk" THEN GOSUB talk: RETURN IF a$ = "help" THEN CALL help: RETURN IF a$ = "pockets" THEN GOSUB inventory: RETURN IF a$ = "hint" THEN CALL hints: RETURN GOSUB 3 RETURN 'Text 1 PRINT "This is the park. It's dark, with the exception of the headlights of" PRINT "your car, which allow you to view a red barn and a dense forest." PRINT "There is also a highway somewhere." loy = 1 IF cbs = 1 THEN PRINT : PRINT "Spiteful is running at you." IF cbs = 0 AND hsniffy = 1 THEN PRINT : PRINT "Sniffy says, `I smell a hat.'" RETURN 2 PRINT "You stumble around behind the car and eventually find a highway." RETURN 3 PRINT "You got me there. Type `help' for a list of commands or `hint' if" PRINT "if you're stuck." RETURN 4 PRINT "After being blinded by a streetlamp, you notice that you're standing" PRINT "on a paved road. There is a stopped bus down the street." loy = 3 IF hsniffy = 0 AND nis = 0 AND ttom = 0 THEN PRINT : PRINT "Behind the bus is a strange creature." IF hguilty = 0 AND nis = 0 AND ttom = 0 THEN PRINT : PRINT "There is a strange creature riding a bike." IF hsniffy = 0 AND nis = 0 AND ttom = 1 THEN PRINT : PRINT "Behind the bus is Sniffy." IF hguilty = 0 AND nis = 0 AND ttom = 1 THEN PRINT : PRINT "Guilty is riding a bicylcle." RETURN 5 IF ttom = 1 THEN GOTO repeat.old.man PRINT "`Listen,' says the old man, `I know what happened to your mom, and I" PRINT "can help you get her back. What I want you to do for me is--see" PRINT "these things?' He points to the sneaky creature. `They're dwarves." PRINT "There are seven of them and I want'em. I'll pay you for them, too." PRINT PRINT "`When you need to, I'll give you a ride on my bus. Your mom may be" PRINT "in trouble; I've heard someone is after her." repeat.old.man: IF nis <> 0 AND hgreedy = 0 THEN PRINT "That creature right in front of you's named Greedy.": ttom = 1: RETURN IF hguilty = 1 AND hsniffy = 0 THEN PRINT "The creature in front of you's Greedy. The one in the street's sniffy.": ttom = 1: RETURN IF hsniffy = 1 AND hguilty = 0 THEN PRINT "The creature in front of you's Greedy and the one in the street's Guilty.": ttom = 1: RETURN PRINT PRINT "`That creature right in front of you's named Greedy. The two out in" PRINT "the street--one's named Sniffy and the other's Guilty. Guilty's the" PRINT "one on the bike.'" ttom = 1 RETURN 6 PRINT "You step off the bus and onto the street." RETURN 7 PRINT "`Have you seen my butterfly net?' askes Sniffy. `I lost it around" PRINT "here somewhere and now I can't find it.'" RETURN 8 PRINT "`Hey, Guilty,' you say, `why don't you let Sniffy have a turn on the" PRINT "bike?' Guilty looks ashamed and gets off." IF pfih = 1 THEN GOSUB 9: RETURN IF bnih = 1 THEN GOSUB 10: RETURN IF bnih = 0 AND pfih = 0 THEN PRINT "Guilty walks away.": hysu = 1: GOSUB 101: RETURN RETURN 9 PRINT "Greedy lands on the pitchfork." PRINT "A metal spear pokes through the top of Guilty. The old man shouts" PRINT "from the bus, `I want'em alive, not dead.'" hysu = 1 GOSUB 101 RETURN 10 PRINT "Guilty plops down into the butterfly net." PRINT "You pick him up and put him in your pocket." hbn = 1: hguilty = 1: bnih = 0 RETURN 11 PRINT "Okay." RETURN 12 IF hguilty = 1 THEN PRINT "`Boy, this thing is heavy,' Sniffy says, and jumps into your pocket." IF hguilty = 0 THEN PRINT "`Thanks,' Sniffy says, and jumps into your pocket." hsniffy = 1 RETURN 14 PRINT "A powerful odor of horse manure knocks you back as you enter the barn." PRINT "There is hay everywhere. Bales of it are stacked to the top of the" PRINT "barn. "; loy = 2 IF hpf = 0 THEN PRINT "There is a pitchfork lying beside a small door." IF hpf = 1 THEN PRINT "There is a small door where there used to be a pitchfork." IF hgreedy = 1 THEN PRINT : PRINT "Greedy jerks around in your pocket. `Hey, wanna' go through that": PRINT "door?' he asks." RETURN 15 PRINT "A tower of hay collapses beside you revealing a butterfly net." bnuc = 1 RETURN 17 PRINT "You reach into the bush in front of the forest and pull out a hat." PRINT "Sniffy places the hat on your head." PRINT PRINT "A small dwarf runs out of the trees. `Arr!' it shouts, then gets" PRINT "ready to spit at you. Sniffy whispers in your ear, `That's Spiteful.'" cbs = 1 RETURN 18 'Nothing 19 PRINT "Spiteful spits at you as you leave. You enter into a strange halluci-" PRINT "nation of being eaten by a small dwarf." hysu = 2 GOSUB 101 RETURN 20 PRINT "`Let's go!' you yell." RETURN 21 nis = 1 CLS PRINT TAB(30); "Part II" PRINT PRINT "The bus arrives at an airport. The old man lets the door swing open." RETURN 22 LOCATE 24, 1 INPUT "Press ENTER to continue", a$ RETURN 23 PRINT "You find yourself on the outside of and looking into an airport. On" PRINT "either side of you, revolving doors spin people in and out; into a" PRINT "stairwell and out to the sidewalk. If you press your face against" PRINT "the glass wall you can see down the stairs, but can't tell what it" PRINT "is, exactly, that's down there." PRINT PRINT "Spiteful is running up the road toward you, warning you of his power." PRINT "A blond-haired woman is behind him." loy = 5 RETURN 24 PRINT "You're standing on a wide staircase, where lots of people are going" PRINT "back and forth. Some are going down; some are going up, but very few" PRINT "are standing in the middle like you. That angers some of them and" PRINT "some of them are more than happy to start you going in either direc-" PRINT "tion." loy = 6 IF rds = 0 THEN PRINT : PRINT "You hear Spiteful and the woman running in the opposite direction." rds = 1 IF msw > 1 THEN PRINT : PRINT "The blond-haired woman sits at the top of the steps. She invites you": PRINT "over for hot tea." RETURN 27 PRINT "This is the kitchen to one of the airport restaurants. The kitchen is" PRINT "empty with the exception of cupboards and knives and a refrigerator." PRINT "There aren't any cooks--the restaurant must be closed." PRINT PRINT "A buzzing fluourescent light casts a dim glow over the center table." loy = 7 IF bic = 1 THEN PRINT : PRINT "Spiteful and the blond-haired woman glare at you from atop a counter.": PRINT "Spiteful laughs, `The poison is taking effect!'": msw = msw + 1 RETURN 29 IF btt = 0 THEN PRINT "As you enter the waiting room, you feel something touch your foot and" IF btt = 0 THEN PRINT "are soon on the ground. The two dwarves tumble out of your pocket." IF btt = 0 THEN PRINT "A stewardess laughs. A pilot giggles." IF btt = 0 THEN hsniffy = 0: hguilty = 0: btt = 1 PRINT PRINT "Stretched across the floor of the airport waiting area is a long wire," PRINT "used as a safety precaution. When someone comes into the room, he or" PRINT "she is tripped, sending any weapons he or she may have tumbling out" PRINT "of his or her pockets. There are more revolving doors leading into" PRINT "the parking lot." PRINT PRINT "A large window shows a black sky and planes taking off and landing." PRINT "The door leading outside is open, although it shouldn't be." loy = 9 IF hsniffy = 0 THEN PRINT : PRINT "Sniffy lies on the floor." IF hguilty = 0 THEN PRINT : PRINT "Guilty lies on the floor." RETURN 31 PRINT "You are standing in the middle of the runway admiring the planes zooming" PRINT "overhead. You feel something wet wiz by your ear. The runway lights" PRINT "illuminate a small dwarf and a woman." PRINT PRINT "The dwarf bares his teeth." loy = 10 msw = msw + 1 RETURN 32 PRINT "On your way back to the terminal, you feel your movements slowed." RETURN 33 PRINT "Once the door is closed, the refrigerator light goes out. It's a" PRINT "good thing the refrigerator door doesn't have a locking handle, or" PRINT "you'd suffocate." loy = 8 bic = 1 RETURN 35 PRINT "You gulp the tea, then make love to the woman. As you are doing so," PRINT "you make it out the revolving doors and roll into the street. The" PRINT "woman's hair gets caught on a passing car and you are dragged several" PRINT "miles until her hair finally tears out. You find yourself at your" PRINT "childhood home." PRINT PRINT "Before you climax, however, your mother, looking very young, shrieks." PRINT "She stomps out of the house. You've forgotten about the blond-haired" PRINT "woman until you notice that now she is nothing but a pillow. Your" PRINT "mother stomps toward you. She opens her jaws and you realize that that's" PRINT "not your mom, that's Spiteful!" yhp = 1 RETURN 36 PRINT "The pillow catches itself in Spiteful's mouth. He begins intaking" PRINT "his own juices and is soon halucinating." cbs = 0 sis = 1 yhp = 0 RETURN 38 PRINT "The driveway of your old house is cracked with weeds. Standing in a" PRINT "lawn of knee-high grass is a for-sale sign. It's been there since" PRINT "your mom moved to an apartment. You remember there was a backyard." loy = 11 IF sis = 0 AND hspiteful = 0 THEN PRINT : PRINT "Spiteful is coming towards you, open jaws dripping with": PRINT "halucinogenic slobber." IF sis = 1 AND hspiteful = 0 THEN PRINT : PRINT "Spiteful lies on the street, a damp pillow in his mouth." RETURN 40 PRINT "The backyard of your house is shadowed by a large oak. Under the oak" PRINT "stands the old man." loy = 12 RETURN 41 PRINT "`Give me the dwarves,' he says." RETURN 42 IF hguilty = 0 OR hsniffy = 0 THEN PRINT "The old man says, `You forgot a dwarf!'": hysu = 6: GOSUB 101: RETURN PRINT "The man hands you ninety dollars. `Get in the bus,' he says, as you" PRINT "realize that there is, indeed, a bus parked in the backyard. You hop" PRINT "in." hguilty = 0: hsniffy = 0: hspiteful = 0 yhc = 1 GOSUB 22 GOSUB 43 GOSUB 44 RETURN 43 CLS PRINT TAB(30); "Part III" PRINT RETURN 44 PRINT "On the bus you see that the driver is an old man wearing a trench-" PRINT "coat. He greets you with a friendly smile." loy = 4 IF hgreedy = 0 THEN PRINT : PRINT "Another creature is trying to sneak onto the bus without paying a" PRINT "fare." RETURN 46 PRINT "Greedy flips through the money as if to mock counting it. `Very" PRINT "nice,' he remarks, and jumps into your pocket." hgreedy = 1 yhc = 0 RETURN 48 PRINT "`Drop me,' he says, `I'll unlock it.'" RETURN 49 PRINT "The door is unlocked." diul = 1 RETURN 50 IF gil = 0 THEN PRINT "Greedy locks the door behind you and runs off.": gil = 1: PRINT : hgreedy = 0 PRINT "Marvelous stone pillars with fires atop them throw light on the " PRINT "wonders of the garden. Under the night sky are flowered trees and" PRINT "birds that make strange noises. Beyond a large monument is a quiet" PRINT "pool." loy = 13 IF hloving = 0 AND hinsecure = 0 AND iiu = 0 AND nar = 1 THEN PRINT : PRINT "Loving cuddles Insecure on a bench." IF hloving = 0 AND hinsecure = 0 AND iiu = 0 AND nar = 0 THEN PRINT : PRINT "Two dwarves sit on a bench in an embrace." IF hloving = 0 AND iiu = 1 AND hinsecure = 0 THEN PRINT : PRINT "Loving sits alone on a bench." IF hloving = 0 AND hinsecure = 1 THEN PRINT : PRINT "Loving sits alone on a bench." IF iiu = 1 AND hinsecure = 0 THEN PRINT : PRINT "Insecure lies unconscious at Loving's feet." RETURN 54 PRINT "Behind the monument the light from the fire doesn't venture. The" PRINT "statue is of a man whose name is all but rubbed away completely." PRINT "What is left are the last two letters of the first name, e and k, and" PRINT "the first two letters of the last name, J and a." loy = 15 IF wwt > 0 AND yhv = 0 THEN PRINT : PRINT "A vase lies on the ground." IF wwt > 1 AND yhm = 0 THEN PRINT : PRINT "A mirror rests by the statue." PRINT : PRINT "There is a rustle in the darkness." IF wwt = 0 THEN PRINT : PRINT "A vase flies at you and hits the monument, unshattered.": wwt = 1: RETURN IF wwt = 1 THEN PRINT : PRINT "A mirror flies at you and hits the monument, unshattered.": wwt = 2 IF iiv = 0 AND hinsecure = 1 THEN GOTO 63 IF hinsecure = 1 AND hloving = 1 AND hgreedy = 1 THEN GOSUB 73 RETURN 57 PRINT "Insecure takes the flowers and jumps into your pocket." hinsecure = 1 RETURN 58 PRINT "They tell you that their names are Loving and Insecure." nar = 1 RETURN 59 PRINT "Insecure runs off, jumps in the pool, and drowns." hysu = 3 GOSUB 101 RETURN 60 PRINT "The flowers are dead." RETURN 61 PRINT "You put Insecure in the vase." iiv = 1 RETURN 62 PRINT "You give the heavy vase to Loving and he jumps into your pocket." hloving = 1 RETURN 63 PRINT "You took Insecure's flowers away." PRINT "Insecure jumps out of your pocket and runs away." hysu = 3 GOSUB 101 RETURN 65 PRINT "You dip the vase in the pool and fill it with water." yhw = 1 RETURN 66 PRINT "You toss the rock at Insecure and hit him in the head, knocking him" PRINT "unconscious." iiu = 1: yhr = 0 RETURN 67 PRINT "You stand at the edge of a pool. A tall, white rock wall looms above" PRINT "you. The water is deep and black. A few stones are scattered around" PRINT "the edge." loy = 14 IF hgreedy = 0 AND gic = 0 THEN PRINT : PRINT "Atop the wall there is a light, held by the hand of Greedy." IF gic = 1 THEN PRINT : PRINT "Greedy is standing a few yards from where you are standing." IF gic = 2 AND hgreedy = 0 THEN PRINT : PRINT "Greedy is lying unconscious by the pool." RETURN 68 PRINT "Greedy says, `You know what'll make me come down?' He holds out a" PRINT "huge diamond. It glances a brief shimmer of reflection on the water." PRINT "He continues, `There's another one around here somewhere, just like" PRINT "it.' He still holds out the gem." gsr = 1 RETURN 69 PRINT "You throw the rock at Greedy. It knocks the diamond out of his hand." PRINT "There is a plip in the water as the gem sinks into the pool. Greedy" PRINT "leaves." hysu = 5 GOSUB 101 RETURN 70 PRINT "You hold the mirror towards Greedy. `Okay,' he says, and climbs down" PRINT "the wall. As he walks toward you his expression changes. `Hey,' he" PRINT "shouts, `Where's my rock?'" gic = 1 RETURN 71 PRINT "The rock hits Greedy in the head and knocks him unconscious." gic = 2: yhr = 0 RETURN 73 PRINT "The old man is here. A light shines over a bed with a dwarf in it." PRINT "The old man whispers, `That's Wonderful.' A pair of handcuffs are" PRINT "connected to the headboard." IF gihc = 1 THEN PRINT : PRINT "A gnome is handcuffed to the headboard." IF stw = 1 AND gihc = 0 AND yhg = 0 THEN PRINT : PRINT "There is a squished gnome on the floor." RETURN 74 IF stw = 1 THEN GOTO repeat.wonderful PRINT "Wonderful glares at you. `I was enjoying making love to this gnome" PRINT "until this moron,' pointing to the old man, `stepped on him. Now he's" PRINT "dead.' You notice a squished gnome on the floor." PRINT repeat.wonderful: PRINT "`Bring him back to life,' he says." stw = 1 RETURN 75 PRINT "With his arms attached to the headboard, you pull his feet until he" PRINT "is stretched back to normal." giok = 1 RETURN 76 PRINT "`He's still unconscious,' says Wonderful, rejecting him." RETURN 77 PRINT "You splash water on the gnome until he revives." giok = 2 RETURN 78 CLS PRINT "`Oh, thank you,' says Wonderful, jumping into your pocket." PRINT PRINT "`I'll take those,' says the old man, relieving you of the dwarves." PRINT PRINT "`Where's my mom?' you ask." PRINT PRINT "The old man hands you Guilty. You stare open-mouthed at the man as" PRINT "he walks off. And as you watch, your mother, the dwarf, slips out" PRINT "of your hands and wanders away." PRINT PRINT TAB(26); "The End" PRINT DO: LOOP UNTIL INKEY$ = CHR$(32) END 79 PRINT "`I don't want that,' says"; who$; "." RETURN 80 IF ttom = 1 THEN GOTO look.again IF lat = 1 THEN GOTO breif.glance PRINT "They look like old men. You are suddenly hit by a terrible thought:" PRINT "if they were met by walking, it would be worse than if protected by" PRINT "a vehicle. You gasp as you realize you are not in a car. Suddenly," PRINT "you're calmed by the idea of the creatures behaving silly. You begin" PRINT "to laugh, but they are beginning to look more sinister. Imagining" PRINT "the `little old men' dancing and singing and other madness makes your" PRINT "skin crawl. You suppress the urge to howl with something far from" PRINT "laughter." lat = 1 RETURN breif.glance: PRINT "You can't help but glance in that direction. As quickly as you look" PRINT "the other way, the image still burns in your mind." RETURN look.again: PRINT "You see them again. The dwarves are now tangible. You laugh at your" PRINT "previous fright. You notice that they are, in fact, dancing." RETURN 81 PRINT "A pipe smokes from the shadow of his face. From his neck extends a" PRINT "long, brown trenchcoat." RETURN 82 PRINT "You're ignored." RETURN 84 PRINT : PRINT "Exits:" IF loy = 1 THEN PRINT "barn": PRINT "highway" IF loy = 2 THEN PRINT "park" IF loy = 3 THEN PRINT "park": PRINT "bus" IF loy = 4 THEN PRINT "highway" IF loy = 5 THEN PRINT "inside" IF loy = 6 THEN PRINT "outside": PRINT "kitchen": PRINT "waiting room" IF loy = 7 THEN PRINT "refrigerator": PRINT "stairs" IF loy = 8 THEN PRINT "kitchen" IF loy = 9 THEN PRINT "outside": PRINT "stairs" IF loy = 10 THEN PRINT "inside" IF loy = 11 THEN PRINT "backyard" IF loy = 12 THEN PRINT "driveway" IF loy = 13 THEN PRINT "pool": PRINT "monument" IF loy = 14 OR loy = 15 THEN PRINT "garden" IF loy = 2 AND diul = 1 THEN PRINT "door" RETURN 85 PRINT "Don't drop that." RETURN 86 IF MID$(a$, 18) = "hay" AND loy = 2 AND hbn = 0 THEN GOSUB 15: RETURN PRINT "`Ouch!' says "; MID$(a$, 18); ".": RETURN 87 IF MID$(a$, 12) = "guilty" AND loy = 3 THEN GOSUB 90: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 12) = "sniffy" AND loy = 3 THEN GOSUB 12: RETURN PRINT "You just cought yourself a "; MID$(a$, 12); ".": RETURN 88 IF MID$(a$, 15) = "man" AND loy = 12 THEN GOSUB 42: RETURN PRINT "Guilty doesn't like the looks of the "; MID$(a$, 15); ".": RETURN 89 IF MID$(a$, 15) = "man" AND loy = 12 THEN GOSUB 42: RETURN PRINT "Sniffy clings to your pocket.": RETURN 90 IF hguilty = 1 THEN PRINT "He's already in the net.": RETURN PRINT "You net guilty." hguilty = 1 RETURN 91 IF MID$(a$, 17) = "man" AND loy = 12 THEN GOSUB 42: RETURN PRINT "`No thanks,' says "; MID$(a$, 17); "." 92 IF MID$(a$, 17) = "vase" OR who$ = "flowers" THEN GOSUB 61: RETURN PRINT "He's not going anywhere without his flowers.": RETURN 93 IF MID$(a$, 15) = "greedy" AND loy = 14 AND gsr = 1 AND gic = 0 THEN GOSUB 70: RETURN PRINT MID$(a$, 15); " sees a reflection of itself.": RETURN 94 IF MID$(a$, 13) = "insecure" AND hinsecure = 1 THEN GOSUB 61: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 13) = "pool" AND loy = 14 THEN GOSUB 65: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 13) = "water" AND loy = 14 THEN GOSUB 65: RETURN PRINT "Don't use the vase on that.": RETURN 95 IF MID$(a$, 16) = "loving" AND iiv = 0 AND loy = 13 AND yhw = 1 THEN GOSUB 11: GOTO 59 IF MID$(a$, 16) = "loving" AND iiv = 1 AND loy = 13 AND yhw = 1 THEN GOSUB 62: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 16) = "insecure" AND loy = 13 AND hinsecure = 0 AND yhw = 0 THEN GOSUB 60: GOTO 59 IF MID$(a$, 16) = "loving" AND loy = 13 AND yhw = 0 THEN GOSUB 60: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 16) = "insecure" AND loy = 13 AND hinsecure = 0 AND yhw = 1 THEN GOSUB 57: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 16) = "vase" AND yhv = 1 AND fiv = 0 AND yhw = 1 THEN PRINT "You put the flowers in the vase.": fiv = 1: RETURN PRINT "Don't use the flowers on that.": RETURN 96 IF MID$(a$, 13) = "insecure" AND loy = 13 AND hinsecure = 0 THEN GOSUB 66: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 13) = "greedy" AND loy = 14 AND hgreedy = 0 AND gic = 1 THEN GOSUB 71: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 13) = "greedy" AND loy = 14 AND hgreedy = 0 AND gic = 0 THEN GOSUB 69: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 14) = "insecure" AND loy = 13 AND hinsecure = 0 THEN GOSUB 66: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 14) = "greedy" AND loy = 14 AND hgreedy = 0 AND gic = 1 THEN GOSUB 71: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 14) = "greedy" AND loy = 14 AND hgreedy = 0 AND gic = 0 THEN GOSUB 69: RETURN PRINT "Watch where you throw that rock.": RETURN 97 IF MID$(a$, 14) = "wonderful" AND giok = 2 AND loy = 15 THEN GOTO 78 IF MID$(a$, 14) = "wonderful" AND giok = 1 AND loy = 15 THEN GOSUB 76: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 14) = "handcuffs" AND giok = 0 AND loy = 15 THEN GOSUB 75: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 14) = "pool" AND giok = 1 AND loy = 14 THEN GOSUB 77: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 14) = "water" AND giok = 1 AND loy = 14 THEN GOSUB 77: RETURN PRINT "Be careful with the gnome.": RETURN 98 IF MID$(a$, 15) = "spiteful" AND cbs = 1 AND sis = 0 THEN GOSUB 36: RETURN PRINT MID$(a$, 15); " doesn't feel sleepy.": RETURN 99 IF MID$(a$, 15) = "door" AND loy = 2 THEN GOSUB 49: RETURN PRINT "You couldn't pay him to do that.": RETURN 100 IF MID$(a$, 14) = "greedy" AND loy = 4 THEN GOSUB 46: RETURN PRINT MID$(a$, 14); " isn't that kind of girl.": RETURN 101 PRINT screw = INT(RND(1) * 2) + 1 IF screw = 1 THEN PRINT "Try that again." IF screw = 2 THEN PRINT "You screwed up." GOSUB 22 CLS IF hysu = 1 THEN pfih = 0: GOSUB 4: RETURN IF hysu = 2 THEN GOSUB killed.by.spiteful: RETURN IF hysu = 3 THEN GOSUB 50: RETURN IF hysu = 4 THEN GOSUB 50: RETURN IF hysu = 5 THEN GOSUB 67: RETURN IF hysu = 6 THEN sis = 0: hspiteful = 0: cbs = 1: GOSUB 29: RETURN killed.by.spiteful: IF loy < 5 THEN GOSUB 1: RETURN IF loy = 12 OR loy = 11 THEN GOSUB 11: RETURN look: PRINT IF MID$(a$, 9) = "creature" AND loy = 3 THEN GOSUB 80: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 9) = "creature" AND loy = 4 THEN GOSUB 80: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 9) = "man" AND loy = 4 THEN GOSUB 81: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 9) = "man" AND loy = 12 THEN GOSUB 81: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 9) = "dwarf" AND loy = 3 THEN GOSUB 80: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 9) = "dwarf" AND loy = 4 THEN GOSUB 80: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 9) = "hat" AND loy = 1 AND hsniffy = 1 THEN PRINT "There is a brown hat hiding under a bush.": RETURN PRINT "It's nothing special." RETURN use: IF MID$(a$, 5, 9) = "pitchfork" AND hpf = 1 THEN GOSUB 86: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 5, 3) = "net" AND hbn = 1 THEN GOSUB 87: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 5, 6) = "guilty" AND hguilty = 1 THEN GOSUB 88: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 5, 6) = "sniffy" AND hsniffy = 1 THEN GOSUB 89: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 5, 8) = "spiteful" AND hspiteful = 1 THEN GOSUB 91: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 5, 8) = "insecure" AND hinsecure = 1 THEN GOSUB 92: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 5, 6) = "mirror" AND yhm = 1 THEN GOSUB 93: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 5, 4) = "vase" AND yhv = 1 THEN GOSUB 94: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 5, 7) = "flowers" AND yhf = 1 THEN GOSUB 95: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 5, 5) = "gnome" AND yhg = 1 THEN GOSUB 97: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 5, 4) = "rock" AND yhr = 1 THEN GOSUB 96: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 5, 5) = "stone" AND yhr = 1 THEN GOSUB 96: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 5, 6) = "pillow" AND yhp = 1 THEN GOSUB 98: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 5, 6) = "greedy" AND hgreedy = 1 THEN GOSUB 99: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 5, 5) = "money" AND yhc = 1 THEN GOSUB 100: RETURN PRINT "Check your inventory." RETURN inventory: PRINT "Inventory:" IF hpf = 1 THEN PRINT "pitchfork" IF hbn = 1 THEN PRINT "net" IF hguilty = 1 THEN PRINT "Guilty" IF hsniffy = 1 THEN PRINT "Sniffy" IF hgreedy = 1 THEN PRINT "Greedy" IF hspiteful = 1 THEN PRINT "Spiteful" IF hloving = 1 THEN PRINT "Loving" IF hinsecure = 1 THEN PRINT "Insecure" IF hwonderful = 1 THEN PRINT "Wonderful" IF yhm = 1 THEN PRINT "mirror" IF yhv = 1 AND yhw = 0 THEN PRINT "vase" IF yhv = 1 AND yhw = 1 THEN PRINT "vase with water" IF yhr = 1 THEN PRINT "rock" IF yhf = 1 THEN PRINT "flowers"; : IF fiv = 1 THEN PRINT " (in vase)" ELSE PRINT IF yhg = 1 THEN PRINT "gnome" IF yhp = 1 THEN PRINT "pillow" IF yhc = 1 THEN PRINT "money" RETURN take: PRINT IF MID$(a$, 6) = "pitchfork" AND hpf = 1 THEN PRINT "You already have the pitchfork.": RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "net" AND hpn = 1 THEN PRINT "You already have the net.": RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "spiteful" AND hspiteful = 1 THEN PRINT "You already have Spitful.": RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "insecure" AND hinsecure = 1 THEN PRINT "You already have Insecure.": RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "greedy" AND hgreedy = 1 THEN PRINT "You already have Greedy.": RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "vase" AND yhv = 1 THEN PRINT "You already have the vase.": RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "mirror" AND yhm = 1 THEN PRINT "You already have the mirror.": RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "flowers" AND yhf = 1 THEN PRINT "You already have the flowers.": RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "gnome" AND yhg = 1 THEN PRINT "You already have the gnome.": RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "rock" AND yhr = 1 THEN PRINT "You already have the rock.": RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "stone" AND yhr = 1 THEN PRINT "You already have the rock.": RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "pitchfork" AND hpf = 0 AND loy = 2 THEN GOSUB 11: hpf = 1: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "net" AND hbn = 0 AND loy = 2 AND bnuc = 1 THEN GOSUB 11: hbn = 1: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "spiteful" AND loy = 11 AND sis = 1 AND hspiteful = 0 THEN GOSUB 11: hspiteful = 1: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "insecure" AND loy = 13 AND iiu = 1 AND hinsecure = 0 THEN GOSUB 11: hinsecure = 1: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "greedy" AND loy = 14 AND gic = 2 AND hgreedy = 0 THEN GOSUB 11: hgreedy = 1: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "vase" AND loy = 15 AND wwt > 0 AND yhv = 0 THEN GOSUB 11: yhv = 1: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "mirror" AND loy = 15 AND wwt > 1 AND yhm = 0 THEN GOSUB 11: yhm = 1: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "flowers" AND loy = 13 AND yhf = 0 THEN GOSUB 11: yhf = 1: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "gnome" AND loy = 15 AND stw = 1 AND yhg = 0 THEN GOSUB 11: yhg = 1: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "rock" AND loy = 14 AND yhr = 0 THEN GOSUB 11: yhr = 1: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "stone" AND loy = 14 AND yhr = 0 THEN GOSUB 11: yhr = 1: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "hat" AND loy = 1 AND hsniffy = 1 THEN GOSUB 17: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "sniffy" AND loy = 9 AND hsniffy = 0 THEN GOSUB 11: hsniffy = 1: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 6) = "guilty" AND loy = 9 AND hguilty = 0 THEN GOSUB 11: hguilty = 1: RETURN PRINT "You can't take that.": RETURN talk: PRINT IF MID$(a$, 9) = "man" AND loy = 4 AND cbs = 1 AND hguilty = 1 AND hsniffy = 1 THEN GOSUB 20: GOSUB 22: GOSUB 21: GOSUB 23: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 9) = "man" AND loy = 4 THEN GOSUB 5: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 9) = "man" AND loy = 12 THEN GOSUB 41: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 9) = "wonderful" AND loy = 15 AND hloving = 1 AND hinsecure = 1 AND hgreedy = 1 THEN GOSUB 74: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 9) = "woman" AND loy = 6 AND msw > 1 THEN GOSUB 35: PRINT : GOSUB 38: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 9) = "dwarves" AND loy = 13 THEN GOSUB 58: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 9) = "sniffy" AND nis = 0 AND loy = 3 THEN GOSUB 7: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 9) = "guilty" AND nis = 0 AND loy = 3 THEN GOSUB 8: RETURN IF MID$(a$, 9) = "greedy" AND loy = 14 AND gic = 0 AND hgreedy = 0 THEN GOSUB 68: RETURN PRINT "You are ignored.": RETURN the.end: INPUT "Do you want to quit (y/n)"; a$ IF LEFT$(a$, 1) = "y" THEN END IF LEFT$(a$, 1) = "n" THEN RETURN GOTO the.end SUB help CLS PRINT "Instructions:" PRINT PRINT "exit/quit quit" PRINT PRINT "ENTER room description" PRINT PRINT "where shows exits" PRINT PRINT "help this screen" PRINT PRINT "use ____ on ____ use something on something else (does not matter what" PRINT " one uses in place of on, just so long as it is two" PRINT " letters long)" PRINT PRINT "take ____ take something" PRINT PRINT "look at ____ look at something (does not matter what one uses in" PRINT " place of at, just as long as it is two letters long)" PRINT PRINT "talk to ____ talk to something (does not matter what one uses in" PRINT " place of to. as long as it is two letters long)" PRINT PRINT "pockets shows inventory" END SUB SUB hints CLS PRINT "Hints:" PRINT PRINT "Rather than redo this game to make it easier and make more sense," PRINT "I've included this hint feature to make up for any stupidity on" PRINT "my part or yours." PRINT PRINT "A problem may be due to the simple command system. When prompted" PRINT "to give an object for a verb, only type the noun, not the adjective." PRINT PRINT "Example:" PRINT PRINT "talk to man" PRINT PRINT "(when talking to the old man in the bus)" PRINT the.question: INPUT "Did I solve your problem"; a$ IF a$ = "yes" THEN GOTO my.rear.end IF a$ = "no" THEN GOTO skip.the.question GOTO the.question skip.the.question: PRINT which.act: INPUT "Which part are you stuck on (1,2,3)"; a IF a = 1 THEN GOTO act.one IF a = 2 THEN GOTO act.two IF a = 3 THEN GOTO act.three GOTO which.act act.one: CLS PRINT "This is a walkthrough of the first act. Read carefully if you don't" PRINT "want to find out too much." PRINT PRINT "Go in the barn" PRINT PRINT "Take the pitchfork" PRINT PRINT "Use the pitchfork on the hay" PRINT PRINT "Take the net" PRINT PRINT "Go to the highway" PRINT PRINT "Talk to the man" PRINT PRINT "Go to the highway" PRINT PRINT "Use the net on Guilty" PRINT PRINT "Use the net on Sniffy" PRINT INPUT "Press ENTER to continue...", a$ CLS PRINT "Go to the park" PRINT PRINT "Take the hat" PRINT PRINT "Go to the bus" PRINT PRINT "Talk to the man" PRINT PRINT "" GOTO my.rear.end act.two: CLS PRINT "This is a walkthrough of the second act. Read carefully if you don't" PRINT "want to find out too much." PRINT PRINT "Go inside" PRINT PRINT "Go to the kitchen" PRINT PRINT "Go in the refrigerator" PRINT PRINT "Go to the kitchen" PRINT PRINT "Go down the stairs" PRINT PRINT "Go to the terminal" PRINT PRINT "Take Sniffy" PRINT PRINT "Take Guilty" PRINT PRINT "Go outside" PRINT INPUT "Press ENTER to continue", a$ CLS PRINT PRINT "Go inside" PRINT PRINT "Go down the stairs" PRINT PRINT "Talk to the woman" PRINT PRINT "Use the pillow on Spiteful" PRINT PRINT "Take Spiteful" PRINT PRINT "Go into the backyard" PRINT PRINT "Talk to the man" PRINT PRINT "Use Sniffy on the man" PRINT PRINT "" GOTO my.rear.end act.three: CLS PRINT "This is a walkthrough of the third act. Read carefully if you don't" PRINT "want to find out too much." PRINT PRINT "Use the money on Greedy" PRINT PRINT "Go to the highway" PRINT PRINT "Go to the park" PRINT PRINT "Go to the barn" PRINT PRINT "Use Greedy on the door" PRINT PRINT "Go through the door" PRINT PRINT "Take the flowers" PRINT PRINT "Go behind the monument" PRINT PRINT "Take the vase" PRINT INPUT "Press ENTER to continue", a$ CLS PRINT "Go to the garden" PRINT PRINT "Go to the pool" PRINT PRINT "Use the vase on the pool" PRINT PRINT "Take a rock" PRINT PRINT "Go to the garden" PRINT PRINT "Use the rock on Insecure" PRINT PRINT "Take Insecure" PRINT PRINT "Use Insecure on the vase" PRINT PRINT "Use the flowers on Loving" PRINT PRINT "Go behind the monument" PRINT PRINT "Take the mirror" PRINT INPUT "Press ENTER to continue", a$ CLS PRINT "Take another rock" PRINT PRINT "Talk to Greedy" PRINT PRINT "Use the mirror on Greedy" PRINT PRINT "Use the rock on Greedy" PRINT PRINT "Take Greedy" PRINT PRINT "Go to the garden" PRINT PRINT "Go behind the monument" PRINT PRINT "Talk to Wonderful" PRINT PRINT "Take the gnome" PRINT PRINT "Use then gnome on the handcuffs" PRINT INPUT "Press ENTER to continue", a$ CLS PRINT "Go to the pool" PRINT PRINT "Use the gnome on the pool" PRINT PRINT "Go to the monument" PRINT PRINT "Use the gnome on Wonderful" PRINT PRINT "" GOTO my.rear.end my.rear.end: END SUB