I miss you.

Years pass and going on without you gets easier, but it doesn't mean that the space you left behind will ever be fully filled. We can try, but your absence won't ever stop being painful.

I can't stop thinking about what you'd think of me now. Would you be proud of me, or would you be mad that I don't follow the path you thought I should take? How would you feel seeing me now, all grown up? The older I get, the more I resemble you. Isn't it strange? I see bits and pieces of you in myself. Even if I wanted to forget, I wouldn't be able to. I know, this is just how genetics work, but I like to think that there's a little more to life than the physical, measurable, objective aspect of it. Maybe through me, a part of you lives on. I don't know.

All I know for certain is that I miss you, and that I wish you could be here. It's probably a very standard thing for a person my age, but I feel quite lost, and I could really use a good piece of advice, or even just some encouragement. Maybe I'm idealizing you, since I never got to see any of your bad sides, but I think you'd know exactly what to tell me.

I miss you, dad. That's all.